Change yourself for the better. An environment conducive to change. Kefir in the fight against extra pounds

Hello dear readers. The daily routine pulls us into its networks, which is why we simply stop appreciating what we have. When for a long time If nothing new happens, it begins to seem that our life has nothing valuable. In general, because of such things, our mood begins to deteriorate, which can even lead to depression. If you're tired of waking up and going to bed in a bad mood because you're not happy with your life, then it's time to radically change it. Do what you have long dreamed of, rather than succumb to social pressure. Every person must find in his life what will truly bring him happiness. Are you afraid of change? You will have to somehow overcome this, since you are unlikely to be able to achieve happiness in other ways.

Stop living the same situations every day, because life will pass like one day, and you won’t even have time to look back.

Become the initiator of change in your own life, and you will see how everything changes in your life. better side.

Many people simply don’t know where to start, because starting from scratch is always difficult. But, we will be happy to help you start this process.

Specifically: several will help you with this practical advice, which will lead you to the main goal - happiness.

How to change your life for the better - where to start

Every day we make grandiose plans about how cool our lives can turn with one snap of our fingers.

But, for some reason, we think that this can happen by itself, and nothing needs to be done for it. Money will fall from the sky tomorrow at noon, and new flat will appear out of nowhere in exactly one year. No, that doesn't happen.

At least - only in exceptional cases. If you really want change, then everything depends on you, and only on you.

When we come to the conclusion that such a development of events does not suit us, we usually make a million plans for ourselves, which in the morning will be forgotten like a dream.

But by the evening the thoughts will return again, and you will reproach yourself for not being able to cope with this on your own and achieve what you set out to do.

It is in this way that a person gradually falls into depression, constantly reproaching himself for all the troubles that happened to him. Therefore, when the first such thoughts appear, you just need to start acting.

Set yourself a clear goal, which will become your guide in the process of resolving all your problems.

What should be the first steps?

Surely everyone has heard the phrase “Do you want to change your life? Begin with yourself". It seems clear to everyone, although few have any idea how to implement it.

Of course, you shouldn’t break yourself, but you should still make some changes to your own habits. Believe me, it will make your life much easier.

In addition, you must clearly imagine the desired result, preferably visually, because this is the only way the process of achieving this goal will seem less difficult to you.

First, you need to decide what exactly doesn’t suit you, and only after that set the necessary goals.

  1. Swipe small analysis own life, simultaneously recording only those moments that need to be corrected. Some of them require only minor edits, while others need to be fixed once and for all. It is best to write down the results of the analysis on a piece of paper, because visual perception is the most effective. So, you will already see the solution to each problem.
  1. Consider each point in more detail, while determining the reason for the desired changes, as well as the means that will help in implementing these same changes. In addition, the list must contain negative items that brought you to this state. Write them down on paper and immediately cross them out, as if you were erasing them from your life.

Once you face your problems, the solution to each of them will immediately become obvious. And determining a solution is already half the battle, even if it’s quite easy.

This way, you can highlight for yourself what is important, and you can simply throw out what is unnecessary.

In addition, you will be able to add to the compiled list several completely achievable desires that will help you find happiness.

You may not have noticed, but the first step has already been taken, which means there is no going back. A difficult path awaits you, which will be full of various difficulties and obstacles, but this should not stop you.

When you feel like you have no strength left, remember where you were in the first place, and this will help you achieve your goal. After all, no one wants to go back to the original, right?

In order not to fall into the abyss of problems and depression again, you need to listen to some advice from psychologists that will make you fight for your happiness.

Advice from a psychologist - how to change yourself and achieve positive changes in life

The most important thing is to know how to change yourself. So, any goal implies drawing up a specific plan for achieving it. It is necessary to take into account all the factors influencing the situation, which is what we will do.

Drawing up a detailed plan

It is necessary to consider each point of the plan, because this is the only way you can achieve your goal.

Put everything in order, especially when your head is in complete chaos. A clearly written plan in your head will become a reflection of the instructions written on paper.

This method will help you bring order not only in your head, but also in your life.

Let's say you want to reset enough a large number of kilograms, but you don’t know how to do it correctly.

Write down on paper all the factors that can, one way or another, affect the result.

  1. Obstacles. Psychologists advise starting with this point, because it will be the farthest from the result. This way, you won't be able to stop just before the goal is fully achieved. In other words, you are initially preparing yourself for the fact that the path will be full of obstacles.
  1. Help. At this point you need to describe the means that will help you cope with the problem. She took second place so that you do not think that you will have to cope with obstacles on your own.

As a rule, you can get help from outside. For example, in the matter of losing weight, a nutritionist or trainer will be the best assistant.

Well, if you can cope with such questions yourself, then the Internet and special literature will come to your aid.

  1. Actions. Actually, it is this point that separates you from the result. Psychologists call it the “control jerk.” Only your actions will lead you to the desired result, so at this point you should write down a list of those actions that will be most effective in achieving your goal.
  1. Result. You must clearly see what you will get for your efforts. Here you write your desires, which can come true if you force yourself to do something. In general, this point will be your incentive.

The unknown always scares a person, because it can stop him on the path to his goal. But if you make a plan that includes even possible obstacles, then this path may seem much easier to you.

Programming yourself to achieve better results

If you encounter such an obstacle on your way as Bad mood or lack of confidence in your abilities, then you need to drive him away from yourself by any means.

Do something that always lifts your spirits: listen to your favorite music album or go online looking for motivational articles.

Or simply re-read the compiled list again and focus your attention on the last item.

When you feel like you're about to give up, remember why you did this in the first place. And how disappointing it will be to return to where we started.

On at this stage Only negativity can hinder us, and this means that we must urgently get rid of it.

And for this, you should listen to the following advice:

Avoid conflict situations that can ruin your mood.

If it already turns out that a quarrel happened to you, then try to find a compromise. This will make it easier to forget about what happened in order to regain your decisive attitude.

Learn to enjoy the little things. Look for the positives even in the worst situations, and then it will be easier for you to cope with difficulties.

Let go of all past grievances that keep you from moving forward. Let go of the past and live only for today.

Sometimes even a slight deterioration in mood can ruin all plans. Therefore, try to ignore all provoking factors and think only positively.

Bad habits out of your new life

Such words evoke in us associations only with smoking and alcohol. But you shouldn’t limit yourself to just these habits, because there are still so many human sins that we, in fact, live with.

So, your life will become much easier if you get rid of these bad habits:

Using swear words in normal conversation.

Chronic lack of sleep, which reduces your performance.

Failure to keep promises.

Laziness.

Putting off until tomorrow what can be done today.

Overeating is also gluttony.

Spending a long time on the couch in front of the TV.

Uninterrupted gameplay on your phone.

Ignoring execution hygiene procedures(unwashed hair).

Damaging a manicure using your own teeth (do not bite your nails).

This is just a sample list of the most common bad habits, so everyone will have their own.

Of course, you can’t cope with such a volume in one day, and it’s unlikely to end well. You need to act gradually, and then you will really be able to overcome them.

Open up to your loved ones

During a period of depression, you may feel that living alone is better, and communication with other people is not necessary.

But, most likely, your stay in this state is due to the absence of loved ones who would hardly allow such a situation.

Therefore, it is best for you to follow these tips:

Don't hide from people when they offer you help when they see that you're feeling bad. It is worth listening to the opinions of your friends on an issue that worries you.

In addition, if some good friend of yours is a fairly confident person who always achieves his goal, then you should talk to him all the more.

Chat with friends as much as possible. Nobody forces you to tell everyone about your problems. Unobtrusive communication with close friends will help you take your mind off your problems and just have a good time.

Hobby as the best way to distract yourself

If you already have a favorite activity, but you simply did not have enough time for it, then it’s time to return to it.

We spend a lot of effort and time on unloved job or some ordinary things, and therefore, there is practically nothing left for yourself.

So why not set aside at least an hour or two for drawing or playing the guitar? Do what will bring you positive emotions.

And then all the previously important problems will seem so insignificant to you.

By the way, if you want real positive emotions, then playing sports is ideal for you.

10 recommendations on how to change your life for the better - where to start

Each person perceives the goal in his own way. Someone, not seeing any obstacles, goes to her, but to others she seems so unattainable that it can even cause fear.

But we must understand that you can be afraid of something all your life and still achieve nothing in the end. Therefore, act immediately so as not to regret it later.

  1. Eat right. In fact, it is food that supports the vital functions of our body, which means that the quality of our health depends on it. And we're not just talking about physical health, because, as they say, “In a healthy body - healthy mind" Therefore, simply filter your diet by getting rid of harmful foods.
  1. Learn other languages. There are no age restrictions for this activity, so don’t even think about “refusing.” Learning new things foreign language will not only be useful for general development, but may also be useful to you when traveling to another country. But you don't have to learn new language. Improve on the good old in English, because this will definitely help you in the future.
  1. Read more. We are not talking about fashion magazines, but about professional literature. Expand your knowledge and develop skills in your field of work. Or re-read the classics of Russian and foreign literature, if scientific style not for you.
  1. Weekends need to be spent actively. IN Lately People have already completely grown accustomed to tablets and computers, and everyone has completely forgotten about active recreation. Because of this, there is a lack of new experiences. Therefore, try to spend your free time on fresh air with friends, and preferably doing something active.
  1. Keep a simple notebook called a “diary” in which you can express all your feelings. Having seen any problems on paper, you will be able to analyze them, and therefore come to a solution. Well, if you want to make money, then your own problems can help you with this. Start a blog where you can share your personal experiences with other people. Perhaps other people will help you get through this difficult period.
  1. Learn to manage your time. Don’t leave important things for “later”, because we all understand perfectly well that this “later” will come only when it’s really hot. This means that this snowball will only grow every day, causing you to panic. Naturally, you won’t be able to redo everything at the last moment, which will make you extremely dissatisfied with yourself.
  1. Avoid spending too much time on the Internet, or at the computer in general. Usually this activity takes a lot of time, which flies by at great speed. It’s better to take a walk outside with friends at this time, or read a book. Any other activity will bring you much more unforgettable emotions than sitting at the computer.
  1. Don't obsess over the news. Of course, every person should be aware of everything that is happening in the world, but you shouldn’t follow it all the time. We can learn the most important news from our friends, and everything else will only get in your way.
  1. Wake up as early as possible. Sleeping until lunch not only takes up a lot of time, but also does not bring you any benefit other than a headache. By waking up early, you will be able to get everything done before the heat of the day arrives. This way, your day off will last much longer than usual.
  1. Travel and it will help you change your life. Nobody says that you need to immediately go to extremes and urgently fly to Africa. It’s quite simple to go to another city, or to a completely different part of the country. Even such a short trip will bring you a lot of vivid emotions.

All these ways will help you get started new life, but this will only happen if you really want it.

After all, we often just complain about our life, but are not even going to do anything to make it change at least a little for the better.

Set yourself a specific goal and go towards it, not paying attention to obstacles, and in no case looking back.

Becoming a completely “new” person is incredibly difficult, but if you feel like you’re not reaching your full potential and you’re not living the right life, then the best way out dramatic positive changes can occur. If you want to change completely, you will first need to honestly assess your current weaknesses and get an idea of ​​the personal qualities you desire. You need to set short-term and long-term goals, find role models to help you move in the right direction, and periodically evaluate the situation to stay on track.

Steps

Part 1

Understand yourself
  1. Determine how much you want change. Just think: “Do I want to change?” To make radical changes, it is important to make sure that you really want it. Evaluate every aspect of your life and see if you want to change them.

    • Evaluate the direction your life is heading.
    • Figure out what activities need to change.
    • Be realistic about the effort and sacrifice required.
    • If you do not believe that you are able to change all aspects, then your venture is doomed to failure.
  2. Determine how much change is possible. If you are convinced that you want to change, you need to find out how possible it is. Sit down and think about whether you have what it takes to make such changes in your life.

    • the ability to change is required;
    • tools for change are needed;
    • time is needed for change;
    • support from loved ones is needed.
  3. Evaluate yourself soberly. It is important to be completely honest with yourself when assessing your qualities. If you “paint” an inaccurate portrait, you will never understand what is stopping you from changing yourself.

    • Ask your peers. If the view from the outside does not correspond to your ideas about yourself, then you are not completely frank.
    • Evaluate the decisions you have to make and the reasons for those decisions. After this, you will understand that it was thanks to such reasoning that you found yourself in your current situation. You will need to make decisions in accordance with the new way of thinking in order to completely change.
    • For example, if you decide to stay home instead of going out with friends, evaluate the reasons for that choice and how they characterize you.
  4. Write down the result. Set and write down the end goal of this process. The goal must be measurable. It can consist of several aspects or represent a global picture. Either way, the goal should remain visible to give you the motivation you need every day.

    Part 2

    Find a role model
    1. Learn from the best. Role models can be anyone: young people, adults, friends, relatives, strangers or celebrities. Find someone who truly is the person you want to become. Maybe you'll like it appearance one person and the actions of another. Use the aspects you want different people for inspiration.

      • If you know each other, make an appointment to chat. Get to know their way of thinking.
      • Gather information if you don't know the person. Find out everything you can find in the media and try to emulate the qualities of such a person in everyday life.
    2. Hang out with the right people. Surround yourself positive people even more important than finding a role model. Being close to a person, you have the opportunity to repeat his actions. Find people who have similar goals or have already achieved them and connect with them.

      • For example, if you want to become a more sociable person, then surround yourself with similar people. If you want to achieve financial success, communicate with financial successful people.
      • Avoid people who negatively influence your changes. If you want to lead more healthy image life, it is difficult to always be around those who sit a lot and often eat junk food.
    3. Find someone who will monitor your progress. He will not let you go astray. In return, you can offer similar assistance. Choose someone you can contact at any time if you are having a hard time. It is also recommended to have weekly meetings by phone or in person to discuss your progress and achievements.

      • It is best if the same role model controls you. Such a person knows exactly what effort it takes to achieve the result you want, so he will be extremely useful to you.

Let's talk about a very important and relevant topic: how to start changing, how to change yourself and your life for the better? Not so long ago, in an article about me, I wrote that the life of anyone modern man does not stand still, changes in it are inevitable in any case, and in order to in the best possible way To adapt your life to such conditions, you must not wait for changes to come from the outside, but initiate them yourself: change yourself and your life for the better.

When changes in life come from the outside, without the will of the person himself, most often they lead to some kind of deterioration, have negative effect. You can change yourself and your life for the better only by initiating changes yourself.

However, it is very difficult psychologically for most people to start changing. After all, to do this you need to get out of your comfort zone, the creation of which has already spent a certain amount of time, effort, and possibly money. How to overcome this psychological discomfort, how to change your life for the better - more on that later.

So, first of all, to start changes in life, I recommend dividing them into 2 large areas:

  1. Change life circumstances.
  2. Change yourself.

Let me explain. By circumstances I mean all the conditions in which a person lives. Moreover, these conditions may or may not depend on the person, and it is necessary to strive to change those circumstances that do not satisfy the person and depend on him, accepting the rest as they are, even if they also do not satisfy.

For example, personal life, work, profession, sources of income, hobbies, place of residence - these are all those life circumstances that a person can influence if he wants to change his life for the better. But the price level, tax rates, and laws of the country are circumstances that a person cannot change, and there is no point in wasting one’s energy on it. Although, by and large, a person can move to another country, where all this will suit him, but these are already too global changes, I think that those who are just thinking about how to start changing are definitely not ready for this.

And if we talk about how to change oneself, then by this I mean changing one’s own attitude towards ongoing processes and phenomena, obtaining what is necessary for life.

To start changing yourself and your life, highlight separately the life circumstances and personal qualities that do not suit you and that you would like to change.

A serious mistake many people make when thinking about how to change their lives is that they incorrectly classify some personal factors or life circumstances as beyond their control, while at the same time trying to change those that really do not depend on them. That is, they evaluate themselves and their capabilities biasedly. Well, for example, instead of changing something in themselves, they try to change the people around them: their significant other, their friends, colleagues, the society in which they find themselves. Such people’s global plans include changing their country for the better or saving the world from a universal catastrophe.

Good goals? It would seem so. The only question is how to go about achieving them. If a person tries to change everything around him without changing himself, this undertaking is obviously doomed to failure. Most likely, such a person will only turn everyone around him against himself, while he himself will not achieve anything and will not change the world. As a result, he will experience a lot of wasted time, energy, and deep disappointment. It would be much more correct to change what he specifically can do: that is, himself and his life circumstances, thereby making his modest contribution to changing the country and the world. After all, the country and the world are made up of people, and if each of them begins to change their lives for the better, both the country and the world will change.

Another common problem is this: many people don't even think about how to change themselves because they think it's impossible. Their life principle: “I am who I am, and I won’t become anyone else.” Such conclusions are based on the erroneous opinion that a person’s character cannot be changed. In fact, this is absolutely not true: you can change your character if you work at it. And in some cases, it can even change itself under the influence of some changed life circumstances.

When thinking about how to start changing, you should understand that if you want, you can change even those qualities of yourself that, at first glance, seem unchanged. Well, for example:

Appearance and physical characteristics. There are many examples when the “ugly duckling” turned into a “beautiful swan”. You need to work on yourself, on your body, play sports, and in extreme cases, now you can even use the services of plastic surgeons. If it really helps you change your life for the better, then why not?

Mind and intellect. If you have the desire and desire, you can very significantly develop your mental abilities. Now there are plenty of opportunities for this: you need to read a lot of useful literature, get useful information from the Internet, audio books, video lessons and other sources. There are examples in history when people who did poorly at school later became geniuses and made discoveries on a global scale.

Beliefs. Many people are prevented from changing their lives for the better by the so-called. . People are convinced that “this is fate, life is unfair, and you can’t achieve more.” This is an initially wrong position. As soon as you change your psychology of poverty to, you yourself will notice how your life will begin to change for the better.

Habits. Changing your habits will also not be a problem, and at the same time such changes will help develop strong-willed personality traits, which is also very important for changing life for the better. You must try to get rid of bad habits and develop good ones. It will be a good helper in this.

Financial position. Moreover, this is an indicator that can and should be changed for the better. There are a great many useful tools for this, most of which are already described on the Financial Genius website. If you are thinking about how to change yourself and your life for the better, one of the directions you should definitely follow.

However, the greatest importance in order to begin to change for the better will not be a change in the above-mentioned qualities, but a change in character, namely, will, volitional qualities. Because everything else will flow from this.

To change yourself and your life for the better, you must, first of all, strengthen your strong-willed qualities and change your character.

As I already wrote, this is not easy to do if we are talking about an adult with an already formed character, but it is possible. How? First of all, it is necessary to objectively identify those weak sides your character that you would like to change. Then try to do things that are characteristic of the character you are striving for.

For example, you are too timid by nature. This means that try to take the initiative as often as possible, take on the role of a leader in the company, and do things that you didn’t do before because of your timidity.

Or you are afraid of many things. In this case, regularly do some bold, risky things, take advantage of some risky attractions, start playing risky sports. At first it will be very difficult for you to overcome your fear, but each time it will become easier because your character will begin to change for the better.

From individual actions habits are developed, from habits - character, and from character - further changes for the better. Therefore, if you don’t know how to change yourself, start with individual actions.

In particular, the following actions will help you begin to change for the better:

  • planning something and strictly following your plan;
  • refusing something that seems wrong to you if it is difficult to refuse;
  • quick and firm decision-making, without any hesitation or long miscalculations;
  • actions that contradict the expectations of your relatives, loved ones, friends, colleagues, acquaintances;
  • rejection of bad habits;
  • giving up unnecessary things that do not bring any benefit (“hanging out” on social networks, computer games, watching TV, etc.);
  • instantly completing important work that you want to put off;
  • putting off non-essential work that you want to do immediately;
  • restraining yourself from words that you really want to say (for example, the desire to argue, prove to another person that he is wrong, to show off his intellect, etc.);
  • the first step towards achieving a meaningful goal ().

By regularly doing such things, you will begin to change your character, and therefore yourself, your life for the better.

When talking about how to start changing, one cannot fail to mention the most important thing, where it all begins: setting goals and objectives. That is, you must immediately determine the goals for the sake of which all your changes will occur. It will help you to correctly formulate a goal, according to which your goal should be specific, measurable, achievable, supported by resources and set in time.

Moreover, it is very important to be able to choose the shortest, optimal path to achieve the goal. Practice shows that many people set themselves the right goals, but at the same time do not know how to search the right way to achieve them.

For example, let’s take the most common goal that most young people set for themselves before starting adult life: become rich and financially independent. The right goal? Quite, if only to specify it as much as possible (I discussed how to do this specifically for this purpose using an example in the article)

But how to achieve this goal? Most people think something like this: first you need to study at an institute, get a promising specialty, then get a job in good company, gain experience, climb the career ladder, and eventually become the head of a company and earn good money.

Can a person become rich and financially independent, change his life for the better if he follows this path? I'm sure that in 90% of cases - no. Look around: everyone once imagined changing their lives for the better this way, but which of them was actually able to achieve something in this way? Probably a few out of thousands. And this is quite logical and natural, now I will explain why.

Firstly, wealth and financial independence are not measured by the amount of earnings, but depend simultaneously on the income and expenditure parts of the personal budget. There is not a word about planning expenses here. Secondly, in the first 5 years you will have to invest a lot of money in training (even if it itself is free, which is not easy to achieve, the learning process entails many additional expenses). Further, at least 2-3 years of work will be needed just to “recoup” the costs of training. Thirdly, relying on a single source of income in order to achieve wealth, especially active earning through it, is, at a minimum, short-sighted, but rather simply stupid. Fourthly, it does not take into account how a person plans to provide himself with at least the most necessary things for life: housing, property. Through salary? Funny... Through loans? You will have to pay off debts all your life... And when will that same wealth come? And if you live in a rented apartment, a good part of your salary, even if it is large by today’s standards, will be spent on paying rent, and there will be nothing left for accumulating wealth. What if you suddenly get fired from your job in the midst of a financial crisis? How will loans, rent, and other expenses be repaid? You can find a number of other points that directly indicate that this path is in the overwhelming majority of cases a dead end. I say again: look around, and you will see this in many living examples.

Therefore, if you are thinking about how to change yourself and your life for the better, stereotypical thinking, like that described in the example above, needs to be discarded: it will not lead you to achieve your goals. We need to look for an effective, real and relevant way for the present time to achieve our goals.

How to do it? First of all, you need to focus on your own financial future, since achieving almost any life goal is inextricably linked with the financial component. Roughly speaking, if there is no money, you will not be able to achieve your goal. In the example above, the person is basically planning how he will make money first for his institute (by paying for his training), then for his employer (by doing work for him and earning him a profit). Perhaps another bank (if it takes out a loan). But not for myself!

If you want to start changing, change yourself and your life for the better, you definitely need to immediately start taking care of. Because success in achieving your goals will largely depend on it. Without financial resources, you are unlikely to be able to change your life for the better.

The site was created to tell you how to change your life for the better, especially with financial side question, but not only. Here you will find a large number useful information, tips and recommendations that will help you start changing for the better: both in terms of personal development and in terms of improving your financial condition and standard of living. Join the number of regular readers, study the proposed materials, ask questions in the comments, communicate on the forum and apply the information received in practice. I hope that Financial Genius will help change your life for the better! See you again on the pages of the site!

It often happens that a person seeking to change his life focuses only on certain areas of life and neglects others.
For example, if he is interested in self-discovery and self-realization, he may not think about physical development. If he is interested in his figure or personal life, he may not remember about his career or finances, etc.

But, as practice shows, this approach is a mistake.
In order to achieve results in any area of ​​life, you must not forget about both the entire personal strategy and those specific areas that seem unimportant to you, but in fact play a significant role. This is the only way to solve a specific issue and change your life in general.

If you don't know where to start, start by improving your appearance.

Here's what a famous plastic surgeon and psychiatrist says:

❝When you change a person's face, you almost always change their future. By changing his idea of ​​his appearance, in almost all cases you change the person himself - his individual qualities, behavior, – and sometimes even talents and abilities❞

This statement applies not only to a radical remake of oneself through plastic surgery, but also to all positive changes in appearance. Having lost five kilograms or getting a new hairstyle, you begin to perceive yourself differently, feel more confident and attractive.

Analyze your habits

The next point is habits. Our habits are the basis of our character. Remember the famous aphorism of Aristotle, which is familiar to many from childhood:

❝If you sow a thought, you will reap an action; sow an action, you reap a habit; sow a habit and reap a character; sow character, reap destiny❞.

Habits are patterns of our behavior that control our lives. Are we really going to let them decide everything for us, following their lead?

Method: Carefully analyze each of your habits and their impact on your life. Eliminate those that interfere with your success, replace them with new, healthy habits.


For those who really decided to work on themselves, I offer the Success Diary - a classic diary with applications for achieving success and working on yourself


4. Conditioned reflexes
No wonder the scientist Pavlov tortured dogs: conditioned reflexes- the basis of the basics. With this key you can create any habit you need.


Method: Repeated actions with reinforcement develop new skills and habits. When a new skill is consolidated, it will go into the subconscious and you will do everything automatically, unloading your brain for new achievements.
Reward yourself for success or deprive yourself of something if you deviate from your plan to change yourself. Let your new quality be necessary and desirable for you.

5. Eradication
What cannot be converted into a plus, simply eradicate it.


How to identify your negative qualities and how to see yourself from the outside, read the article. There you can download a table of negative human characteristics.

6. Double life
The technique is suitable for developing new character traits and more significant changes in oneself.


Method: Imagine yourself as you want to be. Rehearse the new role in your mind over and over again. To be more convincing, buy things that will help you get into character and highlight your new qualities. Wear them only for your second life.
Your surroundings are unlikely to immediately accept the new you, so communicate with those who don’t know you! Practice your new qualities on them. How much will they believe in your image? And if something doesn’t work out, you can always change the place and environment and try again.

7. Use your imagination

The experiment proved that if a person spends a certain period of time every day in front of a target, imagining himself throwing darts at it, then his results will improve to the same extent as if he actually threw darts at the target every day.

Mental imagery allows us to “practice” new relationships and character traits that would otherwise be unattainable. Our nervous system unable to distinguish reality from what our imagination vividly depicted. When we imagine ourselves doing something in a particular way, it is almost the same as actually doing it. Mental practice helps achieve perfection.

Method: Every day in the morning and before going to bed, mentally imagine yourself as you strive to be. How you speak, how you move, what you wear, how you react to situations. Do this over and over again. This mental picture will have a strong influence on your behavior. And remember, how you see yourself from the inside largely determines how others see you.

8. Shock
If you want to change yourself but still don't find enough motivation to start, let failure be your motivation.


Method: Associate with people who will openly despise you. Use other people's ridicule to your advantage. Prove to them that you can be better, more beautiful, smarter. This method has never failed.

9. Alien
Often we behave like pigs with our loved ones. We are rude, we neglect them and do not respect them at all. Whereas with strangers we are completely different, especially with bosses. If you want to change your behavior, try this method.


Method: imagine in the place of your father or mother a complete stranger to you, whom you want to impress. Treat them like a boss on whom your salary depends. Try to look at them detachedly, as if you are seeing them for the first time.

10. Tune in


Method: change your environment and communicate with the people you want to be like. Adopt their habits, their way of thinking. In every book on achieving success, communication with successful people is a must, how does it work?


During communication with another person, we tune in to his wavelength - to the mentality of the interlocutor and his worldview. Without this, communication is impossible. As a result of this adjustment, we temporarily change our ideas, stereotypes of thinking and behavior to those of others. And the more often this happens, that is, the more often we communicate, the more we adopt, until someone else’s picture of the world becomes ours.

11. Cold shower of the “future”
When you really grow up and think about the future, you suddenly realize that it’s time to get rid of many habits and character traits. The thought that you will soon have to build a new life with your family is sobering. I no longer want to waste money, be unnecessary, or drink all night with friends.


Method: Think about the future and the life you want to have, and you will understand for yourself how to change and what habits to eradicate.

But I want to warn you - Don't take on too much. Innate temperament is difficult to change.

An introvert (a self-absorbed person), of course, can change and become its opposite - an extrovert. But he will very soon get tired of this “role” and will be unhappy, being in the public eye, secretly wanting to be alone with himself and his thoughts. There will be a feeling of emptiness. It arises from a loss of energy, because introverts draw it within themselves, and only spend it in communication with others. It becomes clear that leading such a life for a long time is difficult and exhausting.

Be sure to record your victories and defeats in a Success Diary, which is definitely worth starting if you are focused on getting serious results.

Or maybe you don’t need to change?

Find your circle where you will be accepted for who you are and where you will be happy. Everyone has their own value system and it is quite possible that your dream is to change and become more popular, successful, etc. will not bring the desired joy.

Or sublimate your energy into creativity. How can this incomprehensible Freudian term help us? The fact that we can redirect dissatisfaction with ourselves, life, and others into creativity, using defense mechanisms our psyche.

Leonardo da Vinci, the great painter, scientist and engineer, did just that. Whatever he undertook, he brought it to perfection. However, it is reliably known that he had no interest in sex. A similar sublimation can be seen in many creative people. They simply cannot create when they are happy.

Sublimate (redirect) your energy and desires into creativity and new hobbies. Are you a bespectacled person with a bad figure and therefore have difficulties with the opposite sex? There are two ways out - to change by working on yourself: exhausting training plus pickup courses. Or, find your life’s passion and create. We miss your talent so much!

As you change yourself, don’t forget to change the space around you. Tidy up your cluttered apartment and change your wardrobe, how to do it easily and quickly - in Erin Doland's motivating book “Simplify Your Life” ().

There is a deep-seated feeling in all of us that we must act and think exactly as we act and think. It is consistent with or an expression of our beliefs. If there were no belief, then there would be no manifestation of it. There is something in us that causes us to be overweight, bad relationships, failure, poverty, frustration, etc.

How many times have you repeated to yourself: “ I will never do this again!” Despite this statement, you eat cake again, light a cigarette again, be rude to people you care about, etc., even though the day has not yet ended when you promised yourself not to do this again. And yet we do it.

And then we complicate the problem even more when we angrily tell ourselves: “ You don’t have the slightest willpower!” And this makes even more difficult the overwhelming burden of guilt that we already carry on our shoulders. Instead, tell yourself: “ I want to free myself from the hidden desire to be unworthy all the time. I deserve the best in life and I give myself permission to accept it with love.».

The attitude of many of us towards life is primarily a feeling of helplessness. We have long given up on life with its hopelessness and hopelessness. For some, this is due to countless disappointments, for others, constant pain, etc. But the result is the same for everyone - a complete rejection of life and an unwillingness to see oneself and one’s life in a completely different way. Well, if you asked yourself the question: “what exactly causes constant disappointment in my life?” What is it that you give away so generously that causes others to irritate you so much? Whatever you give, you get back. The more irritated you become, the more you create situations that irritate you. I wonder if you were annoyed now while reading the previous paragraph? If yes, then that's great! That's why you need to change! Deciding to change Now let's talk about change and our desire to change. We all want our lives to change for the better, but we ourselves don’t want to change. Let someone else change, let “they” change, and I’ll wait. In order to change anyone else, you must first change yourself. And you must change internally. We must change the way we think, the way we speak, and the things we say. Only then will real change come. I personally have always been stubborn. Even when I made the decision to change, this stubbornness got in my way. But I still knew that this was where I needed a change. The more I hold on to any statement, the clearer it is to me that it is this statement that I need to free myself from. And only when you are convinced of this from your own experience can you teach others. It seems to me that all wonderful spiritual teachers had an unusually difficult childhood, went through pain and suffering, but learned to free themselves, which they began to teach others. Many good teachers constantly work on themselves and this becomes their main occupation in life. Exercise “I want to change” Repeat the phrase: “I want to change for the better” as often as possible. While saying this phrase to yourself, touch your throat. The throat is the center where all the energy necessary for change is concentrated. And be prepared for change when it comes into your life. Know also that if you think that somewhere you cannot change yourself, that is where you need to change. “I want to change. I want to change." The forces of the Universe will automatically help you in your intention, and you will be surprised to discover more and more positive changes in your life. Another exercise Go to the mirror and tell yourself: “I want to change.” Notice how this makes you feel. If you find yourself resisting or hesitating, ask yourself why? For God's sake, don't beat yourself up, just celebrate it. Ask yourself what statement or thought makes you feel this way? You have to dissolve it regardless. whether you know where you got it from or not. Go back to the mirror, look deeply into your eyes, touch your throat and say loudly 10 times: “I want to free myself from all resistance.” Working with a mirror helps a lot. Looking yourself in the eye and saying a positive statement about yourself is the most quick way get good results.

How can you change? Change your beliefs

Change your beliefs and your life will change ! Every thought we have can change! If unwanted thoughts come to you all the time, stop yourself from such thoughts and tell them: “Get out!” Instead, accept a thought that can bring you good luck. Self-improvement is based on three principles:

  • Desire to change.
  • Control over the mind.
  • Forgiving yourself and others.

We talked about the desire to change for the better above, let's talk about control over the mind. We are all much more than our minds. You probably think that the mind is responsible for everything in your life. But such a belief is based only on the fact that you think so.

Your mind is a tool that can be used this way and that way. He is always at your service. Turn off the chatterbox in your mind for a moment and think about the meaning of the statement: “your mind is your tool.” And you decide how to use it yourself.

The thoughts you choose create all your life situations. There is incredible power in thoughts and words. And when you learn to control your thoughts and words, you will be in harmony with this power. Don't think that your mind controls you. Quite the contrary, you control your mind.

Exercise "Release"

Take a deep breath and then exhale all the air. Relax your body. Then tell yourself, “I want to be free. I am released from all tension. I am freeing myself from all my old beliefs. I feel calm. I'm at peace with myself. I am at peace with the process of life itself. I'm safe".

Repeat this exercise three times. When you feel like you're in difficult situation, repeat these phrases to yourself. And then they will become a part of you and will be so natural that all the tension and daily struggle will gradually disappear from your life. So relax and think about something good. It's so easy.

Physical relaxation

Sometimes we need to relax physically. Negative experiences from the situations we find ourselves in and the emotions we experience often remain in our body. One form of physical release from this is the following: close all the windows in the car or house and scream as loud as you can. Hitting a pillow or bed with all your might is another harmless method.

Playing a variety of sports or going for a brisk walk will lead to the same results. I once experienced a terrible pain in my shoulder that lasted a day or two. I tried to ignore it, but it didn't go away. Then I asked myself: “What’s going on, what’s the matter? What annoys me? I couldn't find the answer, so I said to myself, “Well, let's see.”

I placed two large pillows on the bed and began hitting them as hard as I could. After the twelfth blow, I knew exactly what was annoying me. Everything was clear, and I began to hit the pillows even harder and, thus, freed myself from the feeling of irritation. When I finished, I felt much lighter, and the next day the pain completely disappeared.

Liberation from the past

Many of my patients say that they cannot be happy now because they were traumatized in the past. Because they didn't do something they should have done. Because they no longer have what they valued most in the world. Because they have been hurt and cannot love; something unpleasant happened earlier and they remember it. Because once they did something terrible and curse themselves for it. Because they can neither forgive nor forget,

Constantly remembering your past means only hurting yourself. Those who are guilty before us - they don’t care. “They” don’t even know the extent of our pain. Therefore, there is no point in concentrating your thoughts on the past. It is gone and cannot be changed. But we can change our attitude to him.

Exercise “liberation from the past”

Let us consider the past only as a memory. If you remember what you wore in the third grade, then this memory will be without any emotional evaluation. The same can be said about all events in your past.

As we free ourselves, we become able to use all our mental power in the present moment. We can change for the better. Again, watch your reaction. What will you need to do to achieve this? How willing or ready are you to let go of your past? What is your resistance level?

Forgiveness

Our next step with you is forgiveness. Forgiveness is the answer to all questions and problems. I know from my own experience that when we have problems in life, no matter what nature, it means that we need to forgive someone.

Love- the only answer to any of our problems, and the road to such a state is through forgiveness. Forgiveness dissolves resentment. There are several ways.

Exercise “dissolving resentment”

Sit somewhere quiet, relax. Imagine that you are in a darkened theater and there is a small stage in front of you. Put on stage the person you need to forgive (the person you hate most in the world). This person may be alive or dead, and your hatred may be both past and present.

When you see this person clearly, imagine that something good is happening to him, something that means something good to him great importance. Picture him smiling and happy. Hold this image in your mind for a few minutes, and then let it disappear.

Then, when the person you want to forgive leaves the stage, put yourself there. Imagine that only good things happen to you. Imagine yourself happy and smiling. And know that there is enough goodness in the universe for all of us.

This exercise dissolves the dark clouds of accumulated resentment. Some people will find this exercise very difficult. Each time you make it, you can draw in the imagination of different people. Do this exercise once a day for a month and see how much easier your life becomes.

Mental Visualization Exercise

Here's another very good exercise. Imagine yourself as a small child (5-6 years old). Look deep into this child's eyes. Try to see the deep longing and understand that this longing is for love for you. Reach out and hug this little baby, hold him close to your chest. Tell him how much you love him. Tell him that you admire his intelligence, and if he makes mistakes, then it’s okay, everyone makes them.

Promise him that you will always come to his aid if necessary. Now let the child become very small, the size of a pea. Place it in your heart. Let him settle there. When you look down, you will see his little face and you will be able to give him all your love, which is so important to him.

Now imagine your mother when she was 4-5 years old, scared and hungry for love. Extend your hands to her and tell her how much you love her. Tell her that she can count on you no matter what. When she calms down and feels safe, place her in your heart.

Now imagine your father as a little boy of 3-4 years old, he is also very afraid of something and cries loudly, inconsolably. You will see tears rolling down his face. You now know how to calm small children. Hold him to your chest and feel his trembling body. Calm him down. Let him feel your love. Tell him that you will always be there for him.

When his tears dry, may he also become very tiny. Place it in your heart with you and your mother. Love them all, for there is nothing more sacred than love for little children. There is enough love in your heart to heal our entire planet. But let's heal ourselves first. Feel the warmth spreading throughout your body. Softness and tenderness. Let this precious feeling begin to change your life.

My schedule

My day usually goes like this: When I wake up in the morning, before I open my eyes, I express gratitude for everything I have. After my shower, I meditate and pray for about half an hour. Then morning exercises (15 minutes). Sometimes I do gymnastics along with the 6 o'clock morning program on TV.

My breakfast consists of fruit and herbal tea. I again thank Mother Earth for sending me food. Before lunch, I go to the mirror and do exercises: I either say them or sing them. These are statements like:

  • Louise, you are beautiful and I love you.
  • This is the most beautiful day of my life.
  • Everything you need to know will come to you.
  • Everything is fine.

For lunch I usually eat a big salad. Once again, I bless my food and give thanks. Sometime during the day I listen to a tape of affirmations. For dinner I eat steamed vegetables and porridge. Sometimes chicken or fish. Simple food is best for my body. In the evening I read or study. When I go to bed, I mentally remember the past day and bless it. I say I will sleep great and wake up in the morning to a great day. Sounds strange, doesn't it?

Well, how do you start your day? What do you say or think in the morning when you wake up? I remember the time when, waking up in the morning, I thought: “Oh my God, I have to wake up again. Another day". And I got exactly the day I imagined. One trouble after another. Now, before I open my eyes, I give thanks for good dream and for everything good in my life.

About work

Some of us, dissatisfied with our chosen career, constantly think:

  • I can't stand my job.
  • I hate my job.
  • I don't make enough money.
  • I'm not appreciated at work.
  • I just don't know what to do.

These are negative thoughts that bring you a lot of harm. How do you expect to find Good work, if you think like that all the time? This is called approaching the problem from the wrong end. If you currently have a job that you hate for some reason, you need to do the following.

Start by blessing your present work, because it is a necessary milestone on your path. You are now where your life beliefs have led you. So, start blessing everything about your work: the building you work in, the elevator, the rooms, the furniture and equipment, the people you interact with there.

If you want to leave this job, then constantly tell yourself that you are releasing this job with love and giving it to a person who will be absolutely happy in it. And know that in reality, many people aspire to the position you occupy at work.

“I am open and ready to accept work that would use my capabilities and talents. This new job will allow me to realize all my creative abilities and will satisfy me.” If someone at work bothers you, bless that person every time you think about them.

Although we do not choose this, it is important to know that each of us has a little of Hitler and a little of Jesus Christ... If such a person is critical, imagine him as a person who praises everyone: if he is cruel, tell yourself that he is gentle and fair. If you see only the good in people, then they will show you their wonderful qualities, regardless of how they behave with others.

© Louise Hay. Heal your life. The power is within us. - M., 1996