In the most severe illnesses the strongest means, precisely used, are also needed.(Hippocrates)
Pain is something that everyone knows. Pain is different: physical and internal or mental (in psychology, such pain is called psychalgia). Any pain is heaviness, torment, suffering. We perceive pain as cruel punishment, injustice, evil... This is what we want to stop.
So how can we stop it?
How to deal with pain?
First, let's acknowledge that pain is not evil. Pain is our last resort to make us take care of ourselves. We would not have survived to this day if there was no pain.
If there was no pain, then we would not feel the destruction of the tooth, and then we would lose all the teeth.
If there was no pain, then it would not have occurred to anyone to treat bruises, fractures, internal diseases. And this means that we would only live to see the first serious illness. Without feeling pain, we would not understand that something is wrong with our body, we would not go to specialists for help.
Pain is ours faithful assistant that protects our life, our well-being. Pain warns us of the worst by drawing our attention to what is wrong with us and demanding that we fix it.
How to respond to pain?
What would you say if you saw such a picture ... A person who bought a new expensive car, equipped with a good alarm, wakes up at night because the alarm is yelling at the whole yard. Without finding out the reason, he begins to scold the alarm. In his opinion, the alarm is to blame, which does not allow him to sleep. Not the thieves who climb into the car, not himself, out of laziness not wanting to go out to look or call the police, but the alarm! Of course, we would consider such a person not particularly smart (to say the least).
Or another situation... A person suffers pain, despite the fact that everyone around him is advised to urgently see a doctor. He himself believes that only pain prevents him. At first he tolerates it, then tries to drown it out with painkillers. The pain continues to intensify, but in the end it turns out that if he had immediately turned, the doctor would have helped him to do without serious consequences for the body. Now the negative consequences are evident. Is this person smart?
Oh, how we ourselves look like these characters when we suffer from heartache! Unfortunately, we often do not want to see the causes of our mental pain. For some reason, we stupidly endure, suffer, suffer, reach despair (up to suicide), try different ways drown out the pain, we try to fight it, to forget, but ... we don’t hear its signal, we don’t correct its cause.
People whose heartache is so great that they want to free themselves from that pain by committing suicide are like those who struggle with alarms and fuses rather than real reason. They believe that one can be freed from mental pain if the body is destroyed. So it's not the body that hurts! It's the same as if a person has a stomach ulcer, and he tries to cure it by amputating his leg! ..
So what's wrong when the soul hurts?
A normal person understands that it is not the pain itself that prevents us from living, but the reason that causes this pain. Therefore, when something hurts in our body, we try to understand the localization of the pain and find its cause. If there is hope that the cause can correct itself - we wait, endure, taking painkillers, and if we understand that the cause remains and the pain does not go away, then we go to the doctor, we pass diagnostic study, and with the help of an appropriate specialist, we correct this cause. If the kidney hurts - we go to the urologist, if the throat hurts - to the otolaryngologist, if the stomach hurts - to the gastroenterologist, if the heart hurts - to the cardiologist. And who to turn to if the soul hurts?
When the body hurts, we understand that from the nerve endings at the point of localization of the disease, a signal of trouble comes to the corresponding part of the brain.
Where does the signal come from and where does it come from in case of mental pain? Have you ever thought about it?
Not? And why? This is something to think about…
Maybe the signal comes to the brain in an unknown way? Maybe it comes to the heart, because sometimes it hurts from excitement? Maybe the solar plexus is the focus of spiritual pain?
Alas. Science decisively and unequivocally asserts that human consciousness is not localized in the body. That is, no clot nerve cells, even the brain, cannot and does not perform the function of what we call human consciousness. In the near future, our article on this topic will be posted on the site with links to many authoritative sources of high and impartial science.
Therefore, if you are a purely materialist and completely deny the existence of the soul, the invisible world and everything connected with it, we can please you: it means that nothing hurts you. Because according to science, there is no consciousness in the material body, and therefore there can be no mental pain. Therefore, you can immediately begin to rejoice - just as materially as you suffer - and finish reading this article.
Psychology - a science whose very name contains the recognition of the existence of the soul (psyche - soul, logos - to know) - lost a lot when it abandoned the very concept of the soul. That is, it sets as its task to treat the soul, which it has ceased to recognize, but has not introduced any other reasonable understanding of the soul. The situation is simply absurd. How can you treat an organ if you do not recognize it and know nothing about it? Therefore, traditional psychology in the case of mental pain almost always throws up its hands. With the help of modern pharmacological preparations it is possible to weaken the intensity of the pain of the soul, with the help of psychotherapeutic techniques to distract from the pain, learn to live with it, even drown out this pain for a certain time, but despite the vast experience accumulated over a century and a half, modern psychology does not have the ability to influence the eradication of the cause leading to this severe pain.
Why does the soul hurt? (Let's say right away that we do not consider cases of severe mental illness- schizophrenia, etc. - which occur in suicides in about 20% of cases.)
As the body hurts from the fact that we damage it with something or do not give it what it needs, so does the soul. What does the soul need?
One of the contemporary priests writes:
“It is well known that ignoring the deep aspirations of the human spirit gives rise to the very distortion of human nature, which is traditionally called sin - the source of disease. Therefore, the most important thing for a sick person is reconciliation with God, the restoration of trampled or lost manifestations of the human spirit. Reconciliation with God is repentance, it is the awareness of one's sin, the awareness of responsibility for one's life, for the state into which a person has driven himself and the desire, the thirst to begin new life reconciled with God and asked for His forgiveness.
The Church has always associated disease with internal state man, with human sin. Therefore, the basis Church Sacrament Unction for the healing of the sick is a prayer for the forgiveness of sins. And regardless of whether we resort to the Sacrament of Unction, or we are going to be treated, the first thing we must start with is the awareness of our responsibility, the awareness of our sin and the will of God for you to be healthy.
Sin is not a fashionable word. Perhaps because people who are far from the Church understand it as a violation of some rules, the observance of which is necessary from us to God, and not at all to ourselves. After all, the motto of modernity is "take everything from life." And here, for some reason, they demand something from us. Of course we don't like it...
In fact, sin is a crime against one's own soul. Compared to the body, it's like not feeding your body, how to cut it with a knife, hammer nails into it, pour acid on it. God in this case he looks like a kind doctor who stands nearby, with medical instruments and preparations at the ready, and asks us to stop self-torture as soon as possible and come to him so that he can cure us.
If you observe yourself, each person can notice how unpleasant it becomes in his soul when he does something bad. For example, he gets angry with someone, gets scared, upsets someone, takes a bribe, does not give someone what he asks, or cheats on his wife. As such deeds accumulate, the soul becomes heavier and heavier. And we forget what real, pure, childish joy is. We are trying to replace joy with primitive pleasures. But they do not please, but only stupefy. And the soul dries up and hurts more and more ...
And when some important event happens in our life - for example, some kind of big loss, it doesn’t even occur to us that the huge pain that has fallen on us is somehow connected with our mistakes. But that's just the way it is. The pain in various crises of human relations is caused by our vindictiveness, or hatred, or vanity. Pain at break love relationship would have been many times less if the relationship itself had not been overshadowed by resentment and selfishness. The pain at the death of a loved one is exacerbated by grumbling against God. And so on.
The conclusion is as follows: mental pain signals to us that something is wrong with the soul, perhaps we have wounded our soul somewhere and must correct ourselves.
Where is the pain of the soul treated?
If we have never taken care of our soul, believing that the spiritual life consists in visiting theaters and reading novels, then we need help in treating mental pain, we cannot cope on our own.
Where to run when the soul hurts? Where to go for help?
Of course, it is better to go to a place where they will definitely cure you. It should be a place that has a proven tradition of treatment, tools and conditions for treatment, and most importantly, millions of cured patients.
In fact, we have already named the main and only Doctor of mental pain above. I have seen hundreds of people healed of heartache. And all of them were completely cured in only one place and only at the only Doctor. This hospital is the Church, and Chief Physician in it is the Lord God!
This Doctor, who does not treat for money, He does it disinterestedly and with great love. This Doctor is waiting for the one who feels bad, because He is always ready to lend His helping hand. He doesn't have weekends or lunch breaks. He is always ready to start healing your soul.
This Doctor treats not with counterfeit, but with eternally alive, proven and very effective medicines. He never refused to help anyone, but He will not impose himself on you, He will not persuade you to be treated by Him, because this Doctor respects your freedom and choice, and he does not need advertising. This Doctor just sincerely wants to help you because he loves you. He is counting on your trust in Him and your fulfillment of His instructions.
If you do not yet have enough trust and therefore you are still afraid to turn to Him, remember that you are not risking anything. You can commit suicide even after a year of spiritual life. After all, you still have nothing to lose.
How does God heal emotional pain?
We have already found out that pain is caused by violations of the needs of the soul. So, it is necessary to treat this pain by satisfying these needs.
Do not believe that the lists that have been repeatedly distributed, practically canonized by populist psychologists human needs(the most famous of them is Maslow's pyramid), including self-realization, recognition, social status, communication, affection - there is really what a person needs. Even if you get 100 out of 100 on this list, you won't be happy. Because happy is the one who satisfies the needs of the soul. And they differ from the mentioned list.
The main and only need of the soul is, in fact, love. And God is love. Drawing closer to God increases love. Departure from God through sins - reduces love, increases mental pain.
So, the soul needs not some trifles. She needs God Himself. Only He can satisfy her needs.
And He is ready to give Himself to us. He wants to give himself to us and through this to save us from pain and enlighten our souls with love.
Prayer is compared to the breath of the soul or food for the soul. Those who have prayed have experienced the correctness of these comparisons for themselves. Science has not been able to feel, to measure the substance that enters the soul during prayer. The Church calls this substance grace. Prayer is the fastest healer of heartache.
No less necessary source of grace for a person is the communion of the body and blood of Christ. This article is not theological. We only want to show you the only true way to heal the soul from its pain. Therefore, regarding the great miracle of communion, we will only say that the fruits of this miracle are undeniable and tangible. Many people I know got rid of the most severe psychological disorders, body diseases, despair, depression after communion, and once, almost in front of my eyes, a woman recovered from melanoma (very aggressive malignant tumor). Communion is preceded by the healing sacrament of repentance - confession. During confession, a person is forgiven for all their confessed sins. From his soul, as it were, all those nails that he plunged into it are taken out, all the wounds inflicted on him are healed. The conscience of a person becomes pure. Do you still remember how good it is in the soul when the conscience is clear?
You can be satisfied with the short-term effect, the safe experience of a certain crisis. But then a new crisis will soon come. Perhaps harder than before. If you do not want to experience pain, if you want to live in love and joy, you need to take care of the soul constantly.
You need to train yourself to give the soul what it needs and not to do what hurts it. To do this, you need to change your habits.
This is a long process that requires constant attention and effort. But as you, with the help of the Doctor, find your mistakes and correct them in the depths of your soul, the heaviness will leave you, a feeling of true joy will fill your soul.
The main work will be done not by you, but by this omniscient, loving Physician, underestimated by us. All you have to do is accept this wonderful gift of healing.
If you want to be physically healthy, you must follow the rules of hygiene. If you want to be mentally healthy, then here you also need to observe your hygiene standards). As Professor Zurab Kekelidze, Deputy Director of the State scientific center Social and Forensic Psychiatry named after V.P. Serbsky: “There is such a thing as mental hygiene. Don't do what violates mental health! Read the ten commandments - everything is written there! We don’t know the laws, we do a lot of stupid things.”
This is evidenced by the experience of generations that lived before us. They understood it well, saw it, felt the results, passed it on to their children.
And do not scold the pain, do not complain about it, do not suffer, but go to treat it.
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Previous conversation
Mental pain brings not only emotional suffering. It directly affects health and destiny. How to get rid of mental pain, if memories and feelings capture, and there is no strength to cope with them? Now we will learn how to do it.
What is heartache and why does it happen?
Heartache is an emotional feeling that arises from unpleasant events. Its strength depends not so much on the situation itself, but on the attitude to this situation. Like when we die close person we get a lot of heartache. But there are countries where at the funeral they rejoice that the soul of a person has passed into another world.
Such analogues can lead to any unpleasant events, whether it be betrayal, meanness or treason. Any situation can be treated differently.
We all have certain programs and rules sewn in by which we live and we react to events according to our settings.
One of the main causes of mental pain is the selfishness of a person. Let's take betrayal as an example. People generally do not feel connected with the Universe, with God, they do not see the big picture of their destiny and do not understand that any pain teaches something. Instead of understanding why this happened and what lessons need to be learned, anger or some other emotion appears, which is deposited in a person as a mental pain.
If mental pain is not worked out, then depression may begin, appear various diseases, the person will become less fortunate and happy. These pains need to be removed.
The practice of getting rid of pain in the soul
Relax, close your eyes and remember one of the strongest mental pain. We recall this situation so that you have a visual picture. Mentally place it on the left in front of the inner screen.
We do the following actions slowly, with feelings and full attention. Now mentally take out a picture of an unpleasant event from your head and turn it into white light. This way you will get it out of your head.
To squeeze this situation out of the body, you need to exhale sharply and mentally imagine how this unpleasant situation comes out of you with an exhalation. You can take several breaths or many more until you feel relief. The sharper and stronger exhalations, the better.
From feelings, the situation must be removed with love. Feel the state and also mentally squeeze out this picture with love. You can do this by inhaling the love of your saint as you inhale, and as you exhale, this love pushes out your heartache. It will be even more effective, because your power of love may not be enough.
So, mental pain must be removed at 3 levels: from the head by blurring the picture or turning it into white light, from the body by exhaling emotions from emotions by squeezing out love.
Next, we thank the saint: I thank you holy man(name) for giving me the power of the soul, the power of love. Now I will look at this person (situation) with the same eyes, with the same heart. I am not this pain, I am not this death, I am not this hurt(your situation) . I am an eternal radiant soul, I am pure consciousness.
It happens when the earth leaves from under the feet from the loss of a loved one: separation, illness, death. A special world has been built with this person. How to live if the world will not be the same? How to ease the heartache, if the relationship dear to the heart is not revived? Maybe be patient and wait?
The bad has already happened. The misfortune happened not in the movies, but in real life. ?
Time cures?
It happens when the earth leaves from under the feet from the loss of a loved one: separation, illness, death. A special world has been built with this person. The heart stores experiences from a joint move to new apartment, the birth of children or walks in the park. You remember with what expression he rejoices, sad or grumbles. You know how many sugar cubes he likes to add to his tea. And suddenly the usual way is crossed out.
How to live if the world will not be the same? How to appease if the relationship dear to the heart is not revived? Maybe be patient and wait? Yuri Burlan's training System-Vector Psychology"offers another way - to understand the causes of mental pain and with the help of psychoanalysis.
The word is first aid
Even years after the departure of a loved one, it can be painful to reread the letters addressed to you, in which he shared his innermost experiences. AT best case the pain of separation - or betrayal, violence - dulls over the years. But liberation from emotional suffering does not have to wait passively. Just the opposite. For the treatment of pain from a spiritual wound, time is not worth wasting.
First aid for severe mental shock is to speak out.
There is an opinion that when a person has experienced stress, he should be left alone with his feelings and “not reopen the wound.” In fact, to cope with mental pain, you need to immediately start talking with a loved one about what happened. Do not close emotions in yourself, do not hold back tears, do not suppress painful experiences. And do not ignore any painful memory.
If emotional suffering is associated with the fact that a person can no longer be returned, it is advisable to discuss as many happy moments and feelings associated with him as possible. Talk about his achievements and virtues. Such memories will smooth out the bitterness of loss, making room for light sadness.
It is important to speak out as soon as possible after a traumatic event, otherwise negative experiences will be forced into the unconscious. If this happens, it will be more difficult to cope with mental pain later.
It is important to observe safety precautions. Approach with seriousness the choice of a person for a sincere conversation. Make sure that he takes care of your emotions, heartache.
This method can be regarded as first aid, like artificial respiration. When this tool from the psychological "first aid kit" has completed its task, a person needs a resource in order to live on.
How to live on?
People can experience a difficult situation in different ways, and the consequences of loss manifest themselves differently depending on the characteristics of the human psyche.
Emotional suffering
There are people for whom breaking an emotional connection is especially painful. System-vector psychology defines them as representatives.
Emotions are important for people with this type of psyche. In one hour, they can experience the whole gamut of experiences from fear to love. They seek to build emotional ties with people with whom they can exchange hidden feelings or give the warmth of the soul.
The loss of emotional connections makes their soul hurt. Due to unbearable suffering, visual people after an experienced trauma can close, avoid further expression of feelings. This is how they lead themselves into a trap. After all, then they do not implement in fully the abilities inherent in nature, which means that they also lose the ability to experience the joy of life to a large extent.
It happens the other way around, when because of emotional pain it is difficult for them to cope with emotions. Hold back your feelings. Sobs roll over, the reality is hardly realized from emotional overexcitation. From such splashes, the hands are shaking, the head is broken. Instead, emptiness and longing come.
Such conditions may be the result of fear. It serves as the starting point of development for all people with a visual vector. Normally, in an adult, the emotion of fear is redirected into empathy, but in situations of severe stress, it happens that the usual response skills are washed away by a wave of a broken dam. Then the root fear of death can be exposed. It is not always realized and can be expressed at the level of psychosomatics, including panic attacks.
Guilt
This state is caused by the peculiarities of the psyche of the anal vector. Friendship and family for such people is sacred. If they are sure that they hurt a loved one, they reproach themselves greatly for it. Self-criticism is fueled by the innate tenacious memory of the anal vector. It firmly fixes the details of the past, even if you don’t want to remember them at all. What if there is no way to fix the past? A person can get stuck in a state of guilt for a long time and not know how to build his life further. The situation will change if you find a way to make amends by caring for those who need it.
Loneliness
Proofreader: Natalia Konovalova
The article was written based on the materials of the training " System-Vector Psychology»We all know well and often recall the comforting joke that if the head hurts, it means that it is. The same could be said about the soul. Moreover, unfortunately, in relation to the soul, the converse statement is also true: the soul, if it exists, at least from time to time necessarily hurts. For loved ones or from their own sorrows, long and quiet or strong and piercing. Is it possible to identify heartache with fashion in recent times diagnosed with depression? Yes and no. On the one hand, psychologists are really engaged in the restoration of subtle spiritual harmony, whose field of activity even bears the middle name of soul-searching. On the other hand, long before the advent of this area of science and medicine, with mental pain, people turned to clergy and simply wise people. And all because the soul is such a special part of each of us, not so much the body as the personality. And even when it clearly hurts, it is impossible to touch, stroke and “operate” on it.
Therefore, it is necessary to stroke and heal the soul in other, more subtle and more complex ways. And very personal. After all, just as there are no two identical souls, there cannot be equally effective “medicines” for them. And even each new pain requires a new careful and individual approach. “In this case, is there any point in the existence of the corresponding science, since there can be no standard methods in principle ?!” - you might be surprised. We answer: maybe. Because for all our originality, we are all people, we walk the same land, breathe the same air and worry about similar things. Therefore, psychologists are both needed and important. But it is possible that in this or that situation a frank confession or a sincere conversation with a close friend will bring much more benefit than a whole course of psychotherapeutic sessions. Here is how to find your personal way and how to get rid of mental pain without additional moral wounds, we will try to figure it out today. And, if you don’t give definitive answers, then at least find that thread that you can pull to unravel the heavy tangle that has shrunk in your soul.
What hurts during heartache
Soul - does it even exist? Or is it just an imaginary, completely ephemeral substance, invented long before the advent of modern scientific possibilities to explain processes incomprehensible to our distant ancestors? But how, then, can something that does not exist experience such obvious pain and cause great suffering! To answer this question, one will have to look at pain (any - external and internal, physical and mental) not as an unconditional evil, but as a kind of mechanism created by nature with a reasonable purpose. This purpose is to give us a signal that something has gone wrong - in the body, in the thoughts or in the life. This failure may be very small and imperceptible at first, but if it is ignored, it gradually turns into vague anxiety, anxiety, then fear. Fear gives rise to heavy thoughts, and they, in turn, stir the soul, squeezing it and making it hurt.
AT different times people searched (and found!) different means relief from mental pain. First, in the church, which saw the cause of heartache in sin and prayed for its remission. Later - at a reception with psychologists who materialistically deny the existence of the soul and use other tools. But the essence at the same time was and remains unchanged: an inexplicable feeling that eats a person from the inside and prevents him from enjoying life has visited everyone at least once. And, regardless of worldview, level of education, religious preferences, national and gender characteristics and sphere of activity, everyone somehow searched for their own way of deliverance. Because otherwise, mental pain can completely paralyze consciousness and deprive the meaning of life. But if you treat it as a symptom that reports some other problems, then you can and should pull yourself together in time and seek help. But to whom? With a bad tooth we go to the dentist, with a broken leg - to the traumatologist. To whom to carry the aching soul? Unfortunately, there is no unequivocal answer, as well as a professional doctor of the soul. But you can listen to yourself and become such a doctor for yourself. A psychologist, confessor and/or native person in this case, they will help and support you along the way.
Effective treatment for mental pain
Contrary to the stereotype, expectation is not always the best remedy soul healing. Time really heals, but sometimes this treatment is too long and does not exclude the possibility of relapse. The heartache is caused by the most different reasons and therefore the means of deliverance are also varied and multifaceted. But there is a certain “golden code” that can be the basis for anyone seeking to get rid of mental pain as soon as possible. To do this, several conditions must be met. In our version, there are 12 of them - because this number is considered magical or at least positive. Who knows, maybe it is the magic of the number that will partially help alleviate the mental pain. And if not, then nobody canceled the harmony of numbers, aesthetics and just the order of things. Follow it: 
- Drive away the negative. Do not keep it in yourself and do not accumulate it for hours, days, weeks ... Find a way to get rid of what is eating you from the inside, throw it out. Speak out, cry out, even scream. You can do this alone, but it is better together with a very close understanding person. Don't be afraid to stress or offend him. A truly close person will correctly understand your condition and try to alleviate it, take away some of your pain or help you release it. And even the very presence soul mate will definitely make your soul feel that it is not alone and can count on reliable support. If such arguments do not convince you, then listen to the statistics regularly published by psychology publications. According to her, the hushing up of the situation, endless self-digging and digging in one's own difficult thoughts only exacerbates the condition that we called mental pain. Simply put, this is a huge burden on the nervous system, which can subsequently result in not only psychological, but also physical ailments. Therefore, do not worsen your life even more, do not increase your pain, but spread it to the wind in all four directions.
- Look for the positive. A holy place is never empty, and the liberated inner space needs to be filled with something. But not just anything, but good, kind, bright and constructive. Positive emotions are truly powerful. healing power, agree with this and professional psychologists, and soul scientists "from the people", and representatives of religious cults. And all at the same time, especially looking from such different angles, cannot be mistaken. In a mentally ill state, this can be hard to believe and even harder to do. But think about the fact that everything in the world is balanced. For everything bad, there is always a good equivalent to it. Moreover, even stronger, because life goes on, which means that good always turns out to be stronger and wins. And it's up to us to help him. With its energy, its internal resources. And for this it is enough to concentrate them on positive moments - and water wears away a stone. Do not ignore even the most insignificant, but positive facts of what is happening around: the sun is shining in the morning, and it is not raining, the child brought an excellent mark in the diary, and not bad, the taxi driver did not bother talking along the way, but could turn out to be a terrible talker. From these tiny, but inevitable moments, the whole life is formed, day by day. These days pass and the general emotional background remains. It is important for you, like no one else, that it be with a plus sign. But no one but you can set it up in this way.
- Forgive people that hurt you or indirectly caused your pain. When you forgive, it becomes easier, because you no longer hold the burden of resentment in yourself and do not waste your mental strength on it. But you just need to be able to forgive for real, without deceiving yourself. Find a convincing justification for the act of the offending person, or simply recognize his right to make this mistake. His act is his sin and his karma, and you acquire participation only as long as you yourself want it. Stop being a part of other people's shortcomings, forget them and leave them to their owners. Think about yourself, about your cultivation, and about not doing such things. In the end, just be nobler and wiser, imagine that your forgiveness is a gift that you bestow on the offender despite his bad behavior. This is not the best tactic of internal motivation and it smacks too much of pride, but if at first it helps you cope with resentment and forgive the offender, then it’s better to do so than not at all. Look for your own path, comprehend what happened and, perhaps, resentment will even be replaced by gratitude if you realize that the act of another person has shifted something important in your life and launched chain reaction changes. Which, as you know, in the end is always for the best.
- Ask for forgiveness, especially in the event that cats scratch at heart and through your fault too. Conscience is an insidious quality. It seems that you can negotiate with her, but then it turns out that she hid in her soul like a cold snake, wrapped her rings around her and whispers to you about what you don’t want to think about at all. And this may well cause heartache, and quite severe - depending on the strength of your guilt. Therefore, do not be afraid to "lose the crown" - ask for forgiveness from the one who is offended by you. You look and you feel better. And even better - try to correct what happened, to make amends for your guilt. How - there is no universal recipe. In some cases, the very repentance and asking for forgiveness will be entirely enough. In others, you will have to influence the current situation and restore what is still subject to restoration. You may even have to look for ways to please your victim with something unrelated to the problem and thereby rehabilitate yourself as a good person. But if you really suffer precisely from the fact that someone was deceived or offended, then such behavior should definitely save you from mental pain, so go for it.
- forgive yourself- it is very important. Sometimes, even after apologies have been received from others, one's own repentance has been made, and the former relations between people have been restored, inner peace does not come, and mental pain does not subside. As it was said in this case in an old joke: "the spoons were found, but the sediment remained." And worst of all, if this sediment remains on your own heart, because in this case, a reminder of a bad incident always remains with you, wherever you go, whatever you do. And only you can get rid of it. And in general, you are the most important and almost the only person who can heal you from mental pain. All the rest are only assistants in this operating room, ready at the right time to apply a bandage of understanding or a clamp of patience. But the chief surgeon is you. And in your hands is the scalpel with which you must mercilessly cut off your pain so that its metastases do not spread to the depths of your soul. Or not mercilessly. Have pity on yourself. Sorry and sorry. Nobody is perfect, and you are no exception. You have your right to make a mistake and the strength to admit it. This is a complete cycle of transgression, go through it and move on without looping.
- Sublimate. That is, spend your spiritual strength not on experiencing your pain, but on more pleasant and useful activities. The most affordable and successful option is creativity, absolutely any. From cross stitch to ballroom dancing. The main thing is that during creative activities you forget about your mental pain, and after them you feel filled with something new and bright instead of it. Another variant of sublimation is sports, it makes the body work, not the brain, and thus also distracts from heavy thoughts. In addition, in the process exercise the hormonal background is normalized, which positively affects emotional condition. Another option is to get a pet and take care of it, loving it with all your heart, making guardianship over it an important part of your daily life. Or just fall in love. A powerful release of endorphins into the blood is the best pain reliever for the soul. Although with severe mental pain, a new relationship may not work out. In this case, love those people who already make up your family and close circle of your friends. Find joy in serving their interests, enjoy the time spent in their company. Travel, in a company or alone, depending on your temperament and capabilities. You will see new places, strangers, whose lives may turn out to be worse than yours and make you forget about your pain as something not as significant as it seemed. All this will distract you, take time and help you fill and experience the most difficult period. Or sign up for a volunteer circle, help disadvantaged people and animals. Force yourself to be useful - perhaps this will be an occasion to make amends for your sins and, finally, get rid of your mental pain?
- Laugh. Or at least smile. And once again stretch your lips into a smile. Smiling and laughing is best protection from detractors. And now it turns out that you yourself become an ill-wisher in relation to yourself. Do not follow this state of affairs, do not let mental pain spoil your mood, condition, life. Let everyone not become brighter from a smile, the times of naive childhood are long gone, but think: perhaps your second soft smile will warm someone and help get rid of heartache, if not for you, then for him. Everything good, done disinterestedly, is sure to return. The ancient sages said: "Do good and throw it into the water." You don't know where it will carry it, but sooner or later it will return to you or its reflection in the water surface. The earth is round. Well, if without esotericism, then positive emotions, expressed by a smile and laughter, tone all body systems, help it fight stress and normalize the state nervous system and the rate of reactions. Therefore, laughter therapy is a very real method of dealing with depressive states. If you don’t have the strength and desire to smile for no reason, buy a collection of jokes or watch KVN. And the Internet is generally an inexhaustible source of hilarious jokes and fresh jokes, which will not only smile, but also distract you from difficult thoughts for a long time, if you choose the right resources.
- Be mindful of the body. Forcing yourself to smile, you not only emotionally, but also physiologically affect your body. Psychosomatics is not a myth, but a very real relationship between the state of the nervous system and all other organ systems of your body. When for a long time you are in an emotionally depressed state, then eventually it begins to manifest itself not only in your mood and facial expression, but also in other, more serious symptoms. And the widespread chronic fatigue syndrome is just one, and not the most severe, of them. An internal conflict can result in asthma, gastritis, migraines and even oncology. You can compare these processes with the fact that a person “eats himself” with guilt, resentment and torment. Thus, the pain of the ephemeral soul is embodied in the very real pain of tangible organs. Such self-punishment can be unconscious and complicate life gradually, or conscious, when a person deliberately deprives himself of benefits in an effort to incur punishment for his misdeeds. In particular, anorexia is one of the manifestations of dislike for oneself, for one's soul and body. All that can be said about this is do not punish the body for the mistakes of the soul. Separate them, but keep them in harmony, and take care of the first and the second equally.
- trace connection between your heartache and the life events that preceded it. The fact is that psychosomatic manifestations sometimes “work” in reverse side, the only possible direction is not here. And it is possible that your mental pain has not only moral, but also physical reasons. A prerequisite for an oppressed, depressed state can be chronic diseases and developing processes in the depths of the body. You don’t even know about them yet, but they already affect his condition. Therefore, however strange this advice may seem, in order to cure mental pain, you need to cure bodily ailments. If the heart trouble does not go away for a long time and does not develop, passing through its stages, then it makes sense to consult a doctor for diagnostics, take tests and undergo basic blood, urine, etc. tests. Remember to support your mental strength with your physical strength: watch your diet, eat healthy food and stick to a meal schedule. Drink natural juices green tea and enough clean water. Don't litter yourself junk food- and then harmful thoughts will also visit you much less often. Because the hygiene of the body is inextricably linked with the hygiene of the soul, this fact must be accepted and taken into account.
- rejoice Or rather, please yourself. Imagine that you are in... Small child who feels bad and lonely, and he really needs love, care and attention. Love yourself and bestow pleasant, good things. Not necessarily material, but they too. Allow yourself small but regular pleasures, and if the doubt suddenly creeps in that you are pampering yourself too much, treat them as a medicine necessary for healing the soul. Walking at lunchtime can also be such a cure. sunny day, and a delicious cake, despite the diet, allowed yourself with a morning cup of cappuccino. The main thing is that these compliments to yourself do not later cause regrets and remorse, because their task is to please and create a positive life background to get rid of mental pain, and not to aggravate it. Update your wardrobe, buy a long-desired accessory or shoes, get a haircut, manicure, change your image. Take care of yourself like a loved one who desperately needs support and positive emotions.
- Get rid of the anchors, especially if the heartache is caused by the loss of someone or something important to you. It can be quite difficult, but it is still necessary to find the strength in yourself and say goodbye to the past, which cannot be returned. Do not look for the guilty, do not try to change what has happened - just take it for granted and live on, but without it. Throw away, donate, or properly hide things that can become a reminder of the past. Stop deliberately mentally evoking past memories and restoring past situations in your memory. If your heartache is caused by the memory of a person who left your life own will, then do not try to look for connections with him, real or imagined. Neither calls nor meetings are able to return the past, but they hurt and intensify your pain. Even if it seems that even a fleeting contact will ease the experience - this is an illusion. In fact, you will simply tear off the fragile crust from the wound that has just begun to heal. Let pride become your support and adviser: you don’t need to reach out to a person who doesn’t need you. Those people who should be in your life will never leave you or offend you, and everyone else should leave so as not to take someone else's place in your personal world. Now it has been freed and will soon be occupied by someone truly worthy.
- accept the pain- this is the latest, most important and, perhaps, the most difficult advice. But this is the way to healing the soul: through the pain itself. Because it is an integral part of growth. Professional athletes say: “no pain - no gain”, that is, there is no development without pain. You need to constantly remind yourself that no pain goes unnoticed and always has a purpose, even if this purpose is not obvious to you now. But time will pass and, perhaps, it will turn out that it was this life test that opened understanding and doors for you to something bigger and better. Catharsis is also a kind of pain, but it is both revelation and purification. And pain is of two kinds: pain for the sake of pain and pain for the sake of creation. The second kind appears when you do not resist fate and heartache, but allow it to develop you and move you forward. This is your struggle with yourself, the struggle for a life better than now. Perhaps, as a reminder of her, a scar will remain on your soul. So let it be a reminder of your ability to survive and a symbol of your strength.
Definition of mental pain
What is heartache? Is it a disease or defensive reaction organism?
From a doctor's point of view, it's both.
The brain, in this way, tries to convey to us, to signal that it is sick and needs help to cope with today's problem. If he is not helped today, then tomorrow this condition can provoke the formation of a more complex mental pathology.
Emotional pain as a defensive reaction
Any person can experience mental pain, including a mentally healthy person, for example, who has experienced significant loss anyone or anything.
Many conflicts that seem unsolvable in people with a certain type of personality (suspicious, anxious, with increased responsibility, always doubting everything) can cause a feeling of pain in the soul. In these cases, mental pain is regarded as a protective reaction of the psyche to excessive stress.
Mental pain as a symptom of the disease
However, it is not uncommon for mental pain to be a manifestation (symptom) of mental illness ( mental disorder). Should be paid Special attention that the very expression - "mental illness", has a direct origin from the words mental pain. The feeling of mental pain is the most common symptom the most common mental disorder recent years- depression.
The reasons
All the causes of experiencing pain in the soul, as mentioned above, can be divided into two groups:
- the first - diseases (mental disorders and behavioral disorders),
- the second is psychological (psychogenic), conflicts between the "real" and the "desired" (true neuroses).
Help with mental pain
It is possible and necessary to help a person experiencing mental pain.
In some cases, help is a conversation and support, or, conversely, isolation and temporary loneliness.
In others - neurometabolic therapy with the use of special methods of psychotherapy and medications, constant strict supervision by the attending physician.
Unfortunately, there is no universal remedy for mental pain. Each case requires an individual solution.
Treatment
Is it possible to remove or relieve mental pain on your own? If possible, how?
If the pain in the soul is not a symptom of a mental disorder, then you can try to treat mental pain yourself with some activities, such as: cold and hot shower, try to give physical activity(squats, running, swimming), try to sleep.
If mental pain is a manifestation of any disease, then the help of a specialist psychotherapist or psychiatrist is needed. The problem is that, as a rule, with mental disorders, a critical attitude towards their condition may decrease, and the sick person does not seek help, does not turn to a specialist. BUT healthy man who, after stress, suffers from pain in the soul, on the contrary, is inclined to seek support, help from loved ones, tries to find a way to treat mental pain, turns to a doctor for advice.
What to do if you or your loved one is seized and does not let go of the pain in the soul? If, moreover, it also intensifies day by day?
There is only one answer. You need to go to a psychotherapist or psychiatrist.
Firstly, he knows how to quickly help and relieve this painful feeling.
Secondly, if mental pain is a manifestation of any mental disorder and treatment is required, then the psychotherapist will be able to choose therapy (medication and psychotherapy).
The Brain Clinic provides adequate assistance to all who apply with different types and varying degrees expression of pain in the soul.
Call +7 495 135-44-02
We will help you or your loved ones get rid of mental pain!
We help in the most severe cases, even if the previous treatment did not help.
