How to hint a man about a gift: what increases the chances, and what reduces them to zero. How to make a man give gifts. Advice from wise women How to make your husband give gifts

Which man is better to start a serious relationship with? With a man who is so generous that he is able to buy his charming companion a gorgeous bouquet of flowers with his last money and take her to an expensive restaurant, but who then lives up to his salary on crackers, water and instant noodles? Or is it better to define as a life partner a tight-fisted peasant who thinks about the future, but scrupulously cherishes every penny? Whom to choose - mota or curmudgeon? Ideally, you don't need to go to extremes, but ...

But if Cupid brought you together with a tight-fisted representative of the stronger sex, whom you love with all your heart, then get ready to study specialized literature, interview your friends and read this article about how to teach a man to give gifts with or without it.

Why doesn't a man give gifts?

First, you need to answer the question of why some men are in no hurry to give gifts to their soulmates. And completely odious men generally consider it unfair that making presents is the prerogative of the stronger sex.

Of course, guys don't have to give gifts to their girls. But cute surprises with or without, as a rule, indicate that a man wants to do something pleasant to his beloved, wants to please her. Emancipated ladies believe that gifts in relationships are not the main thing. One could agree with this, but feminists often go to extremes and begin to either completely refuse male gifts, or they themselves begin to present their halves with surprises. But you need to understand that for a girl in a present from a man, it is not the financial moment that is important, but the presence of the desire and the opportunity to please the beloved man.

If a man does not give gifts, then ...

• He does not have great feelings for a woman. He just doesn't love her.

• He is immensely in love with himself. And his unwillingness to please his girlfriend with a cute present is only a consequence of his unwillingness to share what he has.

• He's an extremely mean guy. It is possible that such a man will be stingy not only in money, but also in emotions and feelings.

Distributing your "economist" into one of three categories, make allowances for the man's upbringing and his financial capabilities. And now we come close to the question of how how to get a man to give gifts.

It's no secret that there are dynamo women who spin all men for a variety of gifts. But how ethical is this behavior? If you barely met, that is, your relationship is in the initial stage of development, then the man may not like your pressure and he, frightened, will simply run away from you, dropping his slippers. It is necessary to wait for the moment when the relationship between you becomes close and trusting. Having made sure that the gentleman loves you and values ​​you, and does not make gifts solely out of his own stinginess, then in such a situation it is time to show female wisdom, cunning and ingenuity. Use one of the methods below.

A hint is a delicate matter! Try to subtly hint to your beloved what you would like to receive from him on any holiday, for example, on March 8th. If your life partner is a sensitive nature, then there is no doubt that he will understand everything from the first word. However, most of the stronger sex do not understand transparent hints. If this is the case, when you have gotten yourself up to it, state your desires directly. For example, if a man does not give gifts and never took you to a restaurant, then say with a hint of going to a fashionable cafe: "Dear, I really want something tasty!". If a man leaves for a second, and then appears with ice cream from the nearest grocery store, then declare in plain text: “Honey, you have no idea! Friends told me that a new cafe has opened, serving delicious French dishes! Maybe let's go ?! " Quite frankly, such hints are not very effective. Therefore, there is no need to be upset if your attempt ends in failure. Better to use another option.

Envy is a motivating factor! If your favorite cheapskate is a narcissistic and overconfident man, then jealousy can be a motivating factor that will make him rush to the store and buy you a gift. For example, you can say to your beloved: “Darling, my husband gave my friend Sonya an amazing necklace. Today she bragged to everyone at work ... ". The text can be varied, the main thing is to arouse envy in your husband, hurt his pride!

Sincere tears! The sight of a crying woman is unbearable! Women's tears are the weakness of men, which can be used to achieve the desired result, in our case, a gift. For example, you can show your husband your sad mood all day. He, of course, will ask: "Honey, why are you sad?" As soon as this question sounded, immediately sigh sadly, try to squeeze out a couple of tears and babble: "Darling, it seems to me that you are indifferent to me ...". Please note that it is not necessary to pretend to be a meek lamb, i.e. you can throw a loud tantrum. It all depends on your character. Frightened by your hysteria, your husband will calm down and assure you of sincere love. It is at this moment that you can beg for a gift from a man. For some reason, it seems that he will not refuse you. However, keep in mind that this weapon, before which men are powerless, can be used extremely rarely (no more than three to four times a year). If you use tears very often to make a man make gifts, then he, in the end, will get used to your tantrums and will not react to them in the way you need.

Strictly prohibited!

God forbid you to turn to a man with a miserable look and with a request: “Sorry, dear, I'm strained with money. Please buy for me ... ". Do not show a man your poverty, because a poor woman can only cause pity in him, but not respect. If you nevertheless turned to a man with such a request, then do not be surprised that he gives you small gifts. Remember, luxury gifts are for gorgeous women!

Rejoice at every gift from a man, even if he presented you something wrong. Your disgruntled physiognomy is able to discourage the gentleman from the habit of giving you gifts.

So, as part of today's article, we talked about how to get a man to give gifts. They also told in great detail and sketched out an approximate plan of action in the event that a man does not give gifts. And at the end of the article, we will still return to what we talked about at the beginning. Do you need such a tight-fisted type? If the answer to the question is yes, then flag your hands and good luck in re-educating the "economist"!

This situation arises if your man is the type of practical people who do not consider it necessary to spend money on various trinkets, from which there is no benefit. This man will not look for a gift by the nature of the person, or try to arrange a surprise for him. He will just try to find out from his beloved what she needs to give. And to answer this question with the phrase: “I don’t know” is considered a huge mistake. If a man hears such an answer, he will either find some practical thing for you, such as a saucepan, or he will decide that you really do not need anything and, therefore, will not give anything.

What to do? Just tell your loved one directly what you want to receive as a gift. Think it's unromantic? Is it romantic to be left without a gift?

Taking gifts for granted

It also happens that you yourself are to blame for the fact that your boyfriend stopped giving you gifts. Perhaps you constantly showed your dissatisfaction with the presented gifts, or maybe you behaved too indifferently when receiving a gift. But it's not so easy for a man to choose something memorable for you! You have to figure out what to buy, when to buy, how much it costs. And he usually anticipates in advance how happy you will be. And if he does not see sincere joy in your eyes, then he is unlikely to want to be disappointed again. Therefore, the more admiration and gratitude, the higher the chances that the man will want to please you again.

You yourself do not make gifts for your soul mate.

Not all males can surprise with gifts, but most learn to do it from girls who show how to do it. If you have never given anything to a young man, then by doing this you show that it is not so important. There are girls who believe that giving gifts is the responsibility of men. However, who will enjoy the "one-sided game", because it shows that you do not value your partner as much as he appreciates you. Men who do not like to receive gifts can be counted on one hand. Usually, everyone is pleased to feel that they are appreciated and loved.

Natural greed

This phenomenon can be attributed to the type of diagnosis. It is almost impossible to change a greedy person. However, here you can try to change the situation at least a little. You just need to prove that the gift you want will benefit him too. If you have a beautiful necklace around your neck, then everyone around you will see what a wealthy and generous gentleman you have. In general, you need to try to find an approach and prove that a beautiful and well-groomed girl is a reflection of a loving and generous man.

Be able to make sure that you are given gifts

It is believed that if a woman spares no effort to make a man spend money on herself, then she is a "eater of men's hearts." Be that as it may, but still try to create such a situation for the man to present you gifts. The ability to inspire a man with the idea that he should give gifts in order to win a woman's heart is one of the female methods of seduction. And this is, in general, normal! Another state of affairs is abnormal, in which a man does not consider himself obligated to give gifts to a woman, but she puts up with it. And at the same time, the man still believes that he is okay.

A woman should not get a man without any effort, just like that! This is the unshakable rule of the relationship between Him and Her. By the way, the whole world of living nature has been living according to these laws since ancient times. This law says that in order for a man to conquer a woman, he needs not only to try, but also to strain his strength, to please her. This is understandable: only what is gained with effort, with difficulty, is truly appreciated. If the process of conquering a woman requires efforts from a man, then this awakens his masculine essence, he more sharply feels belonging to his gender. Manage, thus, to convey to the man your confidence that you are worthy of gifts. Let him know that you are something worthwhile, that valuable "booty", for the sake of which it is worth trying!

And if a woman does not expect and does not demand anything from a man, will he truly appreciate her? No. Perhaps he will even praise her, but, in fact, he will only use her location, nothing more.

But, encouraging a man to "the process of conquest", show a sense of proportion (I do not get tired of repeating). Do not be forever dissatisfied and insatiable, otherwise, instead of fueling his interest in yourself, you will achieve the opposite effect. Showing eternal dissatisfaction, you, instead of awakening in him the masculine principle, on the contrary, drive him into complexes and cause in him a depressing feeling of his own insolvency, so depressing the male psyche.

I know a young woman who is amazingly able, as they say, to "organize" gifts for herself. She has in her head a whole “list” of what she would like to have in advance (she especially loves, by the way, gold jewelry!). Moreover, these are not some abstract thoughts, but quite concrete positions: she has already looked out for these things for herself in stores, knows their exact price, etc. After that, she is just waiting for the right moment. On the eve of the holiday (and not only), she skillfully leads the conversation to the desired topic, almost leads, walking at ease, a person to the right store and ... the fan has no choice but to fulfill her dream! At the same time, she so sweetly and directly pours out warm gratitude to the donor that he feels at the height of the feeling of his own importance. In short, everyone is happy. However, I think that I have not discovered anything new here for most women, for many of us do something like that.

Important note. Match your "appetites" with your man's financial capabilities. If he is unable to give you expensive gifts, then with your pretentious demands you will only cause an inferiority complex in him, and this negatively affects the male psyche (and not only!). In the end, you yourself chose this man with his material capabilities. In addition, there are tons of gift options that can please a woman. You just need to help the man to show attention to you. Here are some good ideas for inexpensive gifts that are sweet to a woman's heart. I think every woman would be pleased to receive French perfume from a famous expensive brand, even in a small, trial bottle, a widely advertised cosmetic novelty (for example, lipstick, mascara, foundation, etc.), a magnificently illustrated book (for example, about hairstyles or facial skin care, etc.). The list goes on. In this case, it is best to go for a gift together, this will avoid failure in the choice. Trust your man to buy only flowers and sweets for you on his own.

Be sure to warmly thank your loved one for the gift, this encouragement will be an incentive for him for the future. What could be more pleasant for a man than the look of brilliant female eyes and gentle words of praise!

A man will be pleased if you also show signs of attention towards him. But keep in mind that a normal man does not expect a woman to give him expensive gifts. It is generally accepted, as a matter of course, that a woman is inferior to a man in terms of financial solvency. Let your gifts be cute, original and to some extent romantic surprises for him. For example, give him an original, funny car keychain, an elegantly designed notebook or fountain pen, an unusual alcoholic beverage, or a book about his hobby. However, eau de toilette or shaving lotion, but of a higher class than those that he usually buys for himself, along with widely advertised new products, will be a pleasant gift for him. Do not give men ties as gifts, most often they prefer to choose them on their own!

– Manage to inspire your loved one with the idea that he should give gifts to win you over!

– But at the same time, do not show eternal dissatisfaction, so as not to instill in a man a depressing feeling of failure!

the author Kriksunova Inna Abramovna

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One of the most popular questions in my trainings: how to motivate / get a man to give me gifts? And, as a rule, this topic is of interest not only to conditional women with low self-esteem. Most often, the question is asked by successful, beautiful, charismatic and very wealthy girls.

There is a theory according to which the main motivator for men to spend money on a woman is interest in her and the desire to win. Girls consider material investments in them as a so-called indicator of the degree of his interest in the object of desire. This interest is especially strong during courtship - seeking a woman, a man creates an atmosphere with gifts, surprises and special attention. At the same time, for some men, this manner turns into a way of life, while others, even in the "candy-bouquet" period, get off with formal displays of attention.

Men love to give gifts. Everything. Some until a certain moment, until someone of the female sex before you teaches them how not to do this (for example, by their ingratitude for attention and care. By the way, sometimes mothers teach their sons not to give gifts under various pretexts, but now this is not about that )

I was interested to know what Belarusian men think about this. Most of my friends decided to remain silent and only two of them wrote openly, and one comment came in private messages. I share it with you, tk. in my opinion, the motivation of a particular man who loves his wife and wants to please her is described in great detail and competently:

“More often than on occasions, I give gifts just like that. Not even gifts in the traditional sense of the word, but something simply pleasant and unexpected (a bunch of flowers from a grandmother from the passage, a favorite magazine that I forgot to buy, etc.), and therefore evokes sincere emotions of joy. And empirically it was noticed that the kiss at this moment is the most special. To do something pleasant to a loved one, and from an unexpected gift the joy is many times greater than from the expected one. Later it will come back to me, possibly in a different form, and the circle of exchange will close. "

azilka.ru

Akhmatov's sacramental "How many requests a loved one always has, a lover does not have requests" does not always work in our life - sometimes even loved ones, under certain circumstances, do not receive generosity from their men as one of the manifestations of attention. And after the girls, considering themselves unnecessary / underestimated, leave the "stingy" gentlemen (please pay attention to the quotes), they ask their friends: "What's wrong?" Or another common theme: “She only needs money from me,” so they don’t spend at all.

There is a theory that gifts are one of the ways of communication or the so-called love languages, and if a man does not give gifts, it should not be attributed to circumstances such as low income.

It is wrong to believe that wealthy men are generally generous - rather, wise women put more effort into the process of receiving benefits from a wealthy man. If a man is stingy and ascetic towards you, then one of the important communicative moments of your relationship has been missed. But this gap can be easily restored at many trainings, such as, for example, "The man of my dreams."

5 simple rules will help you establish the gift giving process in relation to yourself.

1. Learn to receive gifts

Are you surprised? In personal consultations, most women tell me stories of receiving gifts that make me feel uncomfortable! The science of accepting gifts is available to everyone, but only a wise girl can master it, because gifts are a way of communication. And any art of communication is an art to learn it.

By giving a gift, a man subconsciously expects to receive a certain reaction. If in response a man hears "oh, what are you, why was it necessary to spend money!" or “don’t give me flowers - it’s impractical,” a negative story associated with the donation process will be fixed in his subconscious, even if you wanted to take care of him in this way and even if he understands it. Gratitude should be generous too! In response to any, even insignificant, gift, learn to express positive emotions. And it’s better if it’s sincere. Otherwise, one day you will notice how your man stopped giving you gifts.

A man will intuitively remember the emotions that he experiences from your reaction, he will feel strong and significant, and he will want to experience such emotions again.

naver.com

2. Learn to receive gifts with dignity

Don't show that you are willing to be content with little. Women with low self-esteem rarely attract men, and excessive shyness scares them off no less than manifestations of an aggressive material principle. If you come to a restaurant with a wealthy man, you should not order a glass of water - this will only harm yourself. You yourself must believe that you deserve the best gift, and therefore accept what you are offered with gratitude and dignity.

It also doesn't mean that you need to choose the most expensive dish on the menu and order. Men feel calculated. Just be yourself and allow yourself to enjoy life in the company of a pleasant or loved man. Order something that really pleases you. And your man will definitely see this by your reaction.

3. Ask for a gift at the right time

Sometimes a man doesn't even know that you want something. The main thing, remember, is important to ask for a gift at the right moment. Do not do this when a man comes home tired from work or is in a state of stress. But if he is in a good mood, catch this note and ask for a gift. He will be pleased to do something good for you. Most importantly, remember point 1. This is the most important thing.

Provoke a man for a gift not with direct requests, but with your remarks: "What a beautiful dress!" or "I always dreamed of going there!" Gentle but not overly admiration for the gifts of friends given by their fans, as well as a positive assessment of the generosity of other men, without damaging the self-esteem of your chosen one, are also perfectly acceptable. Hints are the main tool of a wise woman.

4. Do not accept gifts too greedy and aggressive.

Gluttony in the eyes of a woman will frighten off a man who may decide that she sees in him only a resource.

5sfer.com

5. Don't Show Your Independence

Even if you are an absolute self-made and accomplished woman with a successful career, be proud of it without compromising your relationship. It is not worth emphasizing that you can afford everything that you get from a man. Also, you do not need to immediately give the man a return gift - by doing this you deprive him of the sense of self-worth that he receives from the donation process.

But the main thing: no rules work if there are no emotions in the relationship. If a man is good with you, you provide him with comfort and give a feeling of harmony, he will certainly want to be with you and pamper you!

Well, if you want to perfectly master the skills of effective communication with men, welcome to my training. See you in the new issues of my column!

Svetlana Zere - head of LADY.TUT.BY, master of happy changes, author of the best-selling training “

Childhood ended long ago, but we are still waiting for surprises with bated breath. True, now not from mom and dad, but from a beloved man. We are figuring out how not to get a beautifully packaged pot instead of a diamond ring.

Psychologists who are not indifferent to the classification have divided the representatives of the stronger sex into three types. Some are inundated with gifts for the occasion and without, expressing their love. They are equally generous with all women who are important to themselves: wife, mother, daughter. There are those who defiantly do not recognize the holidays. These are disliked children or narcissists, confident that they themselves are the best gift for those around them. But most often there are men who give only on occasion. Preparing for the holiday is a real stress for them. If you help them, over time they will show miracles of creativity. So, determine what type your loved one is, and then start acting. Remember - for your pleasure, even the most staunch opponent of gifts can compromise their principles.

Photo by Ivan Ozerov / Blend Images / Getty Images

Tell us about your dreams

Even if you've lived together for many years, the risk of giving gifts to you is great. Men do not know how to read minds and guess hints, they have a different function in the family. In order not to have to pretend, to pretend to be joyful and to embarrass your loved one, tell them directly what you are dreaming of. Put aside the awkwardness, the man will only be grateful that he has been spared the torment of choice. Better yet, make a wish list, color, model, and where you can buy it. So there will be a chance for a surprise, and the partner will be able to choose what he liked more or suits the cost.

Evaluate the possibilities

Luxurious gifts can be ordered only in the following cases: you are a wife, the one and only lady of the heart, a man has already given expensive things once, he has the opportunity for this. The last is perhaps the most important. Before ordering a fur coat, consider whether he can afford it.

Photo TARIK KIZILKAYA / E + / Getty Images

Motivate correctly

It is important for a loving man to be sure that an expensive gift will be in demand, this is not a fleeting whim. When asking for a fur coat, tell him that in a new thing you will feel as comfortable as in his gentle embrace. That the new perfume will give you sensuality, and in this silk dress you will become simply irresistible, friends will envy him.

Don't rush things

Don't rush things! If you've never asked for anything before, start small. Those who have just begun to develop romantic relationships should take a closer look at their partner. Is he interested in your desires? Do I agree to spend a certain amount on you? And is he going to give anything at all? Sometimes a man is not ready for such actions after a couple of weeks of dating.

Be grateful

The man tried his best to fulfill your desires, and, of course, earned gratitude and praise. Do not hesitate to express your feelings, rejoice like a child: "I am so pleased!", "This is exactly what I have dreamed of all my life!", "I have the best man in the world!" The more sincere and emotional you are, the more pleasant your partner will become. A smile, laughter, a good mood, an enthusiastic look - to see your happiness, a man is ready to do a lot.

Olga Krainova is a writer, relationship consultant, TV presenter, founder of the Good Wife family training center.

There is so much you can get by simply asking for it. We want some nonsense from our beloved man (no matter what: phone, travel, or boots ...), we just need to ask: "Dear beloved husband, please, let's buy me a unicorn horn, I really want it."

Whether he buys it right away or not is another matter. It depends on your budget, his character, today's needs and so on. But at least he will know what you want. And the unicorn horn will go to the Wish List.

And the most important thing:

1. Don't demand momentary execution.

2. Do not come up with a request when the man is hungry.

3. Don't use other men as examples.

And in the video below you will find a master class on how to properly respond to gifts.