Happiness is in the little things. This simple saying perfectly characterizes a happy person. However, there are 8 main signs that can help you understand whether you are truly happy or not. These signs are rather certain life positions that every person should strive for.
1. Find the positive in everything.
Optimism is everything! A person who does not get upset over trifles is truly happy.
2. Don't pay attention to other people's opinions about you.
People's opinions are a very fickle thing. And if today one person blames you, then tomorrow he will praise you if he feels that you are stronger. People are very strange creatures...
3. Nothing is perfect in the world.
Always remember this when you start to find fault with yourself and others.
4. Always stay positive.
Well, there’s no need to even explain anything here. You radiate happiness - and happiness is attracted to you!
5. Always be grateful.
Moreover, to express gratitude and friendliness not only to people, but also to animals and nature.
6. Learning is light!
It's never too late to start learning something. Self-development is one of the goals of a person striving for happiness.
7. Change the world for the better.
Of course, it is not necessary to organize some incredible fundraisers to save fur seals... It is enough just not to throw garbage past the trash can. Even this simple action will change the world around us for the better.
8. Live in the moment!
Never regret what happened. It doesn't matter whether it was good or bad. This is your life and your life experience. The main thing is to appreciate what you have!
Mindfulness is a state (and lifestyle) that many are now seeking. They look for it in meditation or in inner work, in practices and ashrams...
And sometimes someone says: “Now I am aware”.
Test yourself for awareness
(suddenly you decided that you have already reached the heights of “here and now”)
- The first sign of a conscious person is his body.
The body of a conscious person is relaxed and at the same time straightened. The fingers don’t fiddle with anything, the legs don’t twitch with small tremors, the hands don’t straighten clothes or hair every 2 minutes.
A conscious person knows how to be present in the body. If such a person sits, then he sits. Without unnecessary fuss in the body. He knows how to feel the body and control his body.
This is the first and a basic level of person. If he is not able to “agree” with the body, then it is even more subtle worlds he has nothing to do at all!
- A conscious person knows how to cope with negative emotions.
He does not suppress them or manifest them. He transforms them - he completely controls his state and his reactions. He is the master of his emotions and his states.
Thus, a conscious person does not waste energy in vain, and does not spoil “karma” either for himself or for others.
- A conscious person is aware of his verbal center.
A conscious person does not say more than is really necessary. A word either conveys valuable information, or these are words that can raise the energy level of another: kind, beautiful, true :).
Ordinary people speak often in order not to feel lonely; raise your importance; underestimate the importance of others, and most often tell lies. IN in this case lies are everything that is said about others. After all, we usually see others only from one side and cannot be objective, which means we lie.
Any information at the level of speculation, rumors, something that actually does not exist, is of no value to a conscious person.
- Conscious person respects yourself and those around you.
He doesn’t argue with anyone, doesn’t condemn anyone, doesn’t make any claims. He understands that this is a waste of energy, effort and time.
After all, if as a result of increased internal work the energy returns, then as a result of disputes and clarifications of relationships it is lost forever.
A conscious person understands and accepts the limitations of each person. He knows that if they did something “bad” to him, then he somehow deserved it or provoked it.
- A conscious person is in the moment.
He knows how to manage himself and his energy, physical, and intellectual centers.
When he has an exam, he can concentrate and answer questions clearly. When he is with his beloved, he is able to surrender to his feelings.
For an ordinary person, it’s the other way around: difficult situation on the road, he suddenly confuses “right” and “left” and presses on the gas instead of the brake, because the emotional center turned on at the wrong time.
In the arms of his beloved, he thinks about the situation at work...
- A conscious person should human nature (spiritual), not an animal.
Aware of his human nature, he understands that he is not in this life to dominate and suppress. But for the sake of creation and development.
A conscious person does not give up life in the material world, he lives, develops, achieves, but not for the sake of achievement, but for the sake of high goals.
He has no problems with money (that is, he has money). Because money is an opportunity to implement and realize your goals.
- A conscious person knows where is he going and why?.
He knows his purpose and consciously realizes it. He is aware of his role in this life, his contribution to it.
A conscious person takes responsibility for all his states, words, deeds, actions and choices.
Be aware!
PS How do you develop your awareness? Share in the comments below. 🙂
Our mood is so changeable! It is influenced by a lot of different things: problems at work and at home, failures and losses, as a result of which we can despair and lose hope several times a day. It would seem how little depends on us! But in fact, the ability to be happy is everyone’s personal choice. And the main thing in this is to see the pleasant side of things.
There are several sure signs that make it easy to understand that you are truly happy.
You tell people Nice words, you make them happy: when you yourself are happy, you want those around you to be happy too. When you share happiness with someone, it strengthens and prolongs the bright streak.
Tyou ignore minor troubles
Missed the bus? Spilled coffee? Well, okay. If you don't make tragedies out of little failures, that's good sign: you are on the right track.
Are you proud of other people's successes?
Happy man not only does not focus on his own successes, but also cheers for others. When you celebrate someone else's victory, it strengthens the bond between you and that person.
Tyou know how to enjoydatammomentohm
Let's say you are sitting on a bench in the park, you feel warm and pleasant, the birds are chirping, a duck is splashing in the pond - beauty! A happy person enjoys the environment to the fullest. The unfortunate guy doesn’t notice anything and continues to agonize over how he should have responded to the rude guy on the subway.
You know how to calm yourself down
Stress is a terrible destroyer. Therefore, at the first signs of internal tension, you need to bring yourself back to normal. Everyone has their own recipe: take a break, switch your attention, take a walk, stretch. If this process is smoothly running for you, then you are a happy person!
You're not particularly interested in things
Money is not the equivalent of happiness. The abundance of expensive and high-status things has never helped anyone get rid of loneliness or despair. If the main thing for you is not cool new things, but a good attitude towards you, this is a big plus.
It's easy for youcommunicate andmanagerauditionfriends
People like to communicate with someone who makes them feel good, so people are always drawn to happy people. Being around a lucky person, everything seems to start going better.
you appreciatepleasantlittle things
It’s so nice when a passerby just smiles at you, your favorite melody plays on the radio, and the icy road finally thaws! Little things in life are like spices in food: the overall impression often depends on them.
You've reached your goal
And you still have a ways to go. This will make anyone happy. He who sets big goals for himself and strives for them has more reasons for joy than he who goes with the flow.
You sleep well
Maybe you are dissatisfied with something, but if you don’t toss and turn in endless attempts to fall asleep, this is a sign of happiness. Those who constantly experience positive emotions find it easier to sleep at night.
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When a person feels that suffering has come, he must understand that this is luck - this will purify his life. We will not develop this idea, because you will be shocked. A person understands that he is a soul only at the moment of the death of his relatives. He thinks: this life is unfair, there is no happiness here. And he doesn’t believe himself. He cannot understand that he has lived his entire life with false ideas, that the connection with the person who lived in this body remains with him forever. On in a subtle way they are constantly connected. On higher planets, people are able to communicate after death, they trace what body this person is incarnated in, they see the subtle body. If a loved one is born on the middle planets, then he cannot see past loved ones, but they can. In Christianity this is called a guardian angel. This is the inner voice that constantly tells us how to live.
Only the sensation of pain can sober us up: sensations in the mind, in the mind, in the body. The man becomes sober. The Vedas say that there is nothing bad in suffering. When a person understands this, he is happy even in the moment of suffering.
The happiness that comes into our lives is also an exam. I got a lot of money and fell in love with him for the rest of my life. They gave me a bigger apartment. We won the lottery. If a person feels the height of happiness, that is where the happiness ends. It will get worse.
So is suffering. A lot of grief, a peak, then happiness.
Both suffering and happiness are an exam. Moreover, suffering is a gentle exam. And happiness is not a gentle exam. Because At the moment of happiness, a person stops thinking about the meaning of his life. He feels good and doesn't care about anything. He has a good life. Why think about self-awareness? You can watch football, drink coffee. We are not doing the most important thing that our lives are meant to do here. We must try at least higher planets get in. Although in one life we can burn all our sins accumulated over millions of lives and go to the spiritual world immediately after human birth. But most people waste their lives, they waste their lives just to enjoy. They do not understand that they must live for the future, for what would happen to us.
For example, they tell you: whatever goal you set for yourself, you will have it. However, you should know that when you set yourself a small goal, you will forget about the big one. And they show $1000. Go to them and they are yours. But along the way there are small goals: $10, $20. And most people go after these small goals and forget about the big goal. This is the most important manifestation of illusion in our lives.
To get to the higher planets, you need to start desiring what the beings on the higher planets desire. Every second in your life you can note that your body corresponds to the desires that you have. The monkey never thinks about absolute truth. The bear is designed to sleep half the winter. Each body type is designed for its own happiness.
If a person wants to defeat illusion, he must remember the main goal in life every day in the morning. There are several ways to do this:
1. Listen in the morning to the voice of that saint who remembers the purpose of his life. It will clear your mind. A person will remember throughout the day why he lives. This will form the desire body. We cannot change our family, work, environment at one moment. We are in the grip of fate. But being in the grip of fate, a person constantly remembers his main goal in life: to comprehend his spiritual nature, to become happier. We must learn to be absolutely happy. Such a person wants to understand the meaning of happiness. In this case, in the next life the person at least gets to the higher planets. He does the same thing in ordinary life. But he has one main thought: to comprehend the most important thing in life. However, if a person immerses his consciousness too much in the joys that come, watches TV with great interest, loves to eat very much - a person becomes attached to such joys, becoming attached to food, then a person will get all the troubles from food - this is what the Vedas believe. I didn’t eat on time - severe inflammation inside, exhausting the body.
Oversleeping immediately affects the mind. It is difficult for a person to concentrate on the meaning of life, and the immune system weakens. Go to bed at the wrong time - the same consequences. You need to know exactly how much to sleep, how and how much to eat.
Also have sex. According to the Vedas than more people has sex, the less energy a person has to engage in self-awareness. Therefore, there is an ascending branch of evolution: control of sexual desire. The descending branch of evolution is the uncontrollability of sexual desire. Animals have no control over sexual desire. At least people have something. The mere presence of clothing signifies control.
According to the Vedas, out of 8,400,000 life forms in the universe, only 400 are intelligent. Moreover human form life is at the lowest level of rational beings. Most people in past life were animals. This is a transitional stage between unreasonable and reasonable existence. Reasonable existence means not thinking about food, sex, sleep.
The very preoccupation with sleep, food, sex, arrangement causes suffering. Only one who is able to constantly remember that there is no need to cultivate material desires in oneself, but to cultivate at least the positivism of thinking “I wish everyone happiness.” Life will change immediately, even in one year.
The situation must change as a result of a change in our desire body. We try to think well about people, think about God. Gradually, our relationships with relatives change, our work changes. The person becomes happier. He wants to progress further.
The main manifestation of illusion is that we do not know where happiness is and how to go to it. Happiness is within us. This is a pure life, it creates opportunities to be happy. This is the absence of self-interest, living for loved ones. The purest desire is to live for God. But this is not clear to us. We think that God is far away, he is not visible. But according to the Vedas, God is inside us, in the center of the chest, he is the voice of conscience. Right from the center of the chest, God looks at us, he is the closest living being to us. But we don’t want to know anything about God, that’s why we find ourselves in such living conditions. This seems like a fairy tale to most, but you need to understand whether it is a fairy tale or not. You need to listen to where it “fucking”, when you did something stupid, in what place. The voice of conscience means that God is clicking on us vital energy. But we don't want to hear anything.
2. Another way to get rid of illusion is to study the Scriptures. Those Scriptures that suit your faith.
3. Saying the name of God. In your spiritual tradition. At least an hour in the morning you need to read moods and prayers
4. Receiving instructions from a holy person. A person is freed from illusion by the mere presence of a saint.
For example, a saint observes a vow of silence. Walkers come to him and want to communicate with him. The student says to the newcomer: sit down, sit for a while, then ask your question. He sits for a while and understands everything, he understood everything. This is the power of another person's consciousness. The most decent man will enter a brothel and the desire to have sex will flare up in him. And the most sinful person, when communicating with a saint, is cleansed.
The biggest secret is that only communication can change us. But we are so lazy that we don’t want to go and socialize where we can get happiness. There is also resistance to the voice of conscience. The very thought of going to Holy place(and all the temples in the city are holy) causes discomfort: “I’ll go another time, tomorrow, the day after tomorrow.” Because there you need to repent for your bad actions, think about God, change your consciousness.
A person does not want to break out of his illusion. And just as much as a person does not want to break out of his illusion, just as much a person will repent at the moment of death for the years he lived aimlessly. At the time of death, all pious and impious deeds are collected. Slim body the mind begins to collapse into one point - in the human mind. In this mind, a state is recorded - a set of good and bad deeds. The person begins to experience great suffering. He understands what will happen to him next. He lets out a languid cry - this means that he will go to the lower planets. If he rushes around at the moment of death, he will remain on the middle planets. And if he smiles at the moment of death, feels happiness, he will go to the higher planets.
The most important force causing illusion is greed. You just need to not think about how to live better. Greed will not come on its own. If a person is able to rid himself of material joys and think about the spiritual, then only such a person can be considered free from illusion.
ENVY
The term envy in Russian differs from the Sanskrit understanding of what envy is, it is very broad in Sanskrit. The need for such an expansion is due to the fact that it unites many mental tendencies in a person’s character, and they can all be expressed in one word. Putting these trends together in one word, we can see different manifestations qualities of character that are associated with the word envy.
There are 4 types of envy, only 2 are real, the others are false.
Spiritual. If a person never boasts of his achievements, never criticizes the achievements of other people, he is absolutely sinless, there is not even a shadow of envy in his heart.
Non-envy in goodness means that a person understands that he condemns other people, their shortcomings, understands that he is envious to some extent, but knows that this is wrong - he suppresses this feeling in himself.
Lack of envy in passion is not non-envy, it is self-deception. People don't envy their loved ones and friends, they envy everyone else.
In ignorance. A person is so stupid that he does not understand the benefits of something.
There is a true ego or understanding of one's worth, a person feels worthy if he does good deeds and is therefore glad that he does it. When such a person commits a bad act, he considers himself a scoundrel and repents of it. True egoism manifests itself as a feeling of one's dignity or stupidity.
A person who is under the influence of false ego considers himself always good. Or bad, but due to circumstances. True ego means living for others, and false ego means living for yourself. According to Vedic scriptures, false ego is the cause of all suffering.
Envy is the desire to take advantage of someone else's happiness or the feeling that some person is hindering happiness. Envy is always the interaction of two false egos. A person who makes it his goal to live for himself will compete with others and will not escape the envy of others.
There are two types of people in this world - divine natures and demonic ones. There is only one criterion that determines this - envy. If a person understands that he is envious, is able to admit it to himself and resist, then he has a divine nature. If a person is unable to understand that he is wrong, he has a demonic nature. He will not be happy, because he will always be at enmity with everyone. An envious person sees shortcomings in a good person, criticizes him and suffers from this. A good person does not pay attention to this and does not condemn this person, because he understands his nature. An envious person, criticizing a person in passion, in return receives criticism and defense of the person's shortcomings in passion. An ignorant person experiences great suffering when he sees criticism addressed to him, because he has a very strong false ego, he simply goes berserk, he is ready to destroy. A sign of ignorance is complete infinity, the ability to destroy for a small mistake
Reason is the knowledge of what happiness is. A person in goodness believes that happiness is living in the name of the holy law, in the name of other people. A good person does not have a false ego. A passionate person lives in the name of material wealth, he wants success in society, and believes that there are no other goals in life. He gains tension, a feeling of lack of time, and acquires illnesses. His mind is covered with egoism. He sees the world in two ways: what contributes to his desires, he is happy about it, and when there are some obstacles, he cannot accept the world. He has a one-sided reality; he does not understand that the world does not consist only of “carrots”. The ignorant's mind is always covered with egoism, he never sees his shortcomings and never admits that he is wrong. His mind is completely covered with egoism.
A sign of constant anxiety is that a person has more than half of selfishness in his mind. If more than half of knowledge is of a selfish nature, then “if it is not my way, I will have more trouble.” Because other people will also show their selfishness towards such a person. When selfishness is pointed out, a good person takes it as a joke, a passionate person gets nervous, and an ignorant person is ready to kill.
Constant worry – high level of envy. Envious people consider themselves good, only the circumstances have turned out this way: the husband is unsuccessful, the health is not very good, the country is bad, the weather is bad. A person who wants to live for himself constantly pays attention to those factors that prevent him from enjoying. A person who is ready to live for others believes that if the husband is a drunkard, then there is something to work on. If children don’t want to study, then it’s due to karma, that’s how I studied myself. Nature has no bad weather, every weather is a blessing. A good person is always happy. At work they give me little money, which means I won’t be greedy. The psychology of a good person is incomprehensible to us. This is the problem, because we have confused what happiness is.
The worries of envious people are immeasurable. Envy has such a nature that if someone envies someone, then the nature of the other person is aroused, and a bad feeling appears towards the one who was jealous. To insult means to speak badly about a person, immediately a connection will be established with this person, and he will have every reason to think badly about the one who insulted. Envy does not ask us, it itself puts pressure on us. You don’t need to do something bad, just don’t do something good, and envy will come on its own.. If you didn’t say hello to your neighbor, envy will begin to accumulate.
There are situations in life when envy will definitely arise, and we will not be able to do anything about it if we do not act correctly.
Let's look at these situations.
1. The first situation exists for all people without exception. These are the relationship between the husband and the wife's parents, the relationship between the wife and the husband's parents, and the relationship between the parents of both spouses. This relationship will tend towards jealousy from the very beginning. Because the husband considers his wife to be his property, the wife's parents will consider their daughter to be their property. They have these feelings intersecting, and they can’t do anything about it. Envy is always between people, but it seems to us that envy comes from another person. But the hook has equal tension on both sides. The false ego acts in such a way that it is impossible to let go of its hook. Proving you are right, the problem is getting worse. For example, a wife tells her husband’s parents: “I love him, I care about him, don’t touch us, please.” It seems like she's right. But they say that “we love him even more than you. Don't ruin our happiness." She says: Well, I’m not touching you!” - “and we won’t touch you!” Hostility begins. Because they don't touch each other. This situation is called a swamp. If a person just stands in a swamp, he will be sucked in. If the husband does not touch his wife's parents, and the wife does not touch her husband's parents, then they will begin to hate each other. Therefore, in this situation, they must first of all give all their feelings of gratitude and love to their husband’s parents; she must try to love them more than her parents. The same should be true for the husband’s attitude towards his wife’s parents. And the parents of the spouses must respect each other in advance.
If we think badly about our relatives, it means that we envy them. Women often envy their drunken husbands because they have a man's body. The female body is not designed for drunkenness, it is designed for dryness of character. If a man does not receive love from a woman, he starts drinking. Love is inside female body, she gives it to the children, as a group. If she treats her husband dryly, then he will be a drunkard. She says that she is unlucky in life because her husband is bad - that means envy. One must admit that the wife has a dry heart and live with a drunken husband. You can overcome this only by doing good deeds towards the one you envy.
2. Another situation that is a stumbling block in life is a woman, a son and a second husband. According to Vedic knowledge, this woman is the enemy of her son. Because she loves both her husband and her son. And the husband and son, just meeting, feel envy. Because the husband came to love not his son, but his wife. And the son also has nothing to do with this person. One person comes between two, and they begin to be torn apart by envy. Moreover, the husband says: “I treat him normally, I have nothing against him, for some reason he doesn’t love me.” If you ask your son, he will answer the same thing. According to Vedic knowledge, if you want such a family, then the man must first establish friendly relations with his son. A man who takes a woman with a child should try from the very beginning to love the child, and not the wife (he will love her anyway), show friendly feelings, knowing that the child will resist this.
When a woman and her daughter get married, there are fewer problems. Because a relationship can be established between a man and his daughter due to the opposite sexes. But they may not immediately like each other. Then it will be very difficult to install later a good relationship. It’s the same situation when a father and son and someone else’s wife.
3. Next situation– this is envy between neighbors on the site. A neighbor's dog pooped on his rug - hate for life. If he had joined this crowd somewhere on the street, then there would not have been such envy. Envy arises simply because they are neighbors. We must try to extinguish this fire by any means.
4. Another situation is envy in the production team. Two people are applying for one position. Between them will begin big problems. Even if they are at enmity with each other, envy will still be present. You need to calm down your envy a little. What to do? One should be more reasonable and please the other in every possible way, even if he does not reciprocate.
5. Another manifestation of envy can be in other situations, like on the bus. When you stood up to get a ticket, and someone had already sat in your place. If you feel hostility towards this person, then you need to say: “I’m sorry that I sat in your place before.” Otherwise there will be envy.
How should a person deal with his envy?
A person should make donations, repeat “I wish everyone happiness,” everyone with whom he works, his neighbors, relatives, whom we talked about earlier. If he doesn’t do this, it will be the same as if he doesn’t brush his teeth – his breath will stink. Envy accumulates in the heart simply because a person lives.
You need to make donations on days favorable for this. One of these days is payday. At this time, the false ego increases greatly, the person begins to want more for himself. Therefore you need to sacrifice.
Consequences of envy.
Envy exists. It leads to the fact that an envious person is subsequently born on the lower planets. There are three gates to hell: anger, greed and envy. Envy most often leads to malignant tumors, affects the genitals and organs associated with hormonal functions. Anger most often affects the nervous system/skin, and greed - digestive tract. This is a mercy for a person, because having suffered during his lifetime, he may not be born on the lower planets. But if he cures the tumor, but does not work it off with spiritual practice, then he can go to the lower planets.
For envious people there are special planets where they are born. Most often they are born in the bodies of snakes. The snake is the most envious creature. According to Vedic knowledge, there are two types of envious creatures that will not begin to progress until they are destroyed - snakes and scorpions. That is, the goal of life of a poisonous snake is hatred, it constantly accumulates poison. A living being falls into the body of a snake because he has felt envy all his life. If a person spends his entire life gossiping about others and saying only bad things all the time, he is made of the same poison. He will be born so many times until this snake is destroyed. Then he can be born in another body. According to Vedic knowledge, a person can kill a snake if it threatens his life. The same goes for Scorpio. Because the snake and the scorpion have only one idea of life - to accumulate poison.
According to the Vedas, envious people will degrade. And the sign of such people is that they never accept accusations against them. If an envious person has offended a sage or a holy man, then his degradation will be inevitable until he asks for his forgiveness. It is a blessing for such people not to meet a holy person in their lives.
You should know that when two people are fighting, the third person should not take either of their positions, even if he is right. Because immediately in the heart of the one who is deprived, envy immediately arises towards the one who has taken a different position. But a person must protect his children, parents, mentor and his friend. Protection - when he is in danger. If a person can cope with this situation himself, then it is better not to interfere.
And if you are accused of something, then in this case the false ego is aroused and envy arises, you want to defend yourself and blame in return. But when emotions calm down, you need to immediately ask for forgiveness from such a person. If he is in goodness, then ask for forgiveness out loud. If in passion, treat him with respect and show that you are giving some kind of encouragement: be the first to say hello, give up your seat. If a person is in ignorance, then it is enough to greet him. There is no need to ask him for forgiveness out loud, this will result in an even bigger scandal. A passionate person’s reaction to verbal forgiveness will be: “I forgive you, but...”. When a good person is asked for forgiveness, he asks for forgiveness in return.
Bad relationships with people need to be corrected as quickly as possible. According to the Vedas, fires, debts and diseases must be eliminated as quickly as possible. Envy relates to debts. If we feel dislike for a person and do not try our best to wish this person happiness so that the heart can completely calm down, then in the next life we will definitely repay the debt to him. We will be born in such a situation that this person will bring us suffering. Sometimes envy is cultivated in the heart to such an extent that this person is born an ungrateful child in the next life. You need to wish your child happiness with all your might, leaving him alone.
Due to our ignorant behavior, we often build relationships such that our relatives are born our relatives because of our envy in the past. And the whole life of these relatives is built on accusations alone: “If you were this, then I would be that...” Their character traits are so juxtaposed that they cannot please each other. These people owe each other. To overcome accumulated envy, you need to wish each other happiness.
At first it seems that there is love. But love is just a way to connect people with each other. And then they begin to work off karma with each other. Besides love there is also duty.
Another type of envy is when people get divorced, the woman is always jealous of her wife ex-husband. She thinks it's unfair that someone else is enjoying him. A man is less inclined to this. In this case, you need to treat your spouse even better after the divorce than before. Otherwise this envy will suffocate.
MADNESS
Insanity means no thinking, no emotional understanding of things. In Sanskrit it means absence of intelligence. There is no word for “insanity” in the Russian language, so great insanity fits what we will talk about.
The mind is of a subtle nature. He guides us in life, is the force with which our destiny is decided. We cannot resist our mind. This is a key point in our consciousness. We cannot resist the desire of reason. Bad habits are a type of madness. A person cannot act differently than this. Although he wants to. This is only possible if the mind has a certain taste. The Vedas call this taste the desire for a certain type happiness that cannot be refused.
The taste for happiness in the Vedas is called in one word - rasa or taste. Taste is in the mind. The mind consists of knowledge, which is necessary only to obtain happiness. People who are in goodness understand happiness as love for God. Everything else for them is auxiliary points: comfortable life, amenities, etc. People in passion believe that happiness is when everything is good at home, there is health, money, comfort. People in ignorance consider happiness to be in a state in which the mind is not disturbed. When the voice of conscience does not disturb. This state is usually drunk, drug addicted, intoxicated by sex, a roller coaster. Something has to happen to distract you from life. Such people reach the point where the perversions of such people progress until they begin to border on suicide.
All people on earth have a certain degree of madness. This is because we misunderstand happiness. We think that happiness is delicious food. But you know that there is never too much happiness, it is always not enough. For example, every day you have a little tasty food that will not spoil your health. Will it be happiness or will you want more of this food? You will want more.
Happiness is never enough. This means that we are soul, we want endless happiness. This is only possible in spiritual world. Spiritual energy - we smile at each other, pray to God. If we want money, then this is material energy. In the material world there is a rule: the more joy we are given, the more we plunge into suffering. For example, the food is delicious. This is joy. We become attached to her. If we are given food that tastes bad, we will be unhappy. The second type of suffering is when a person suffers from gluttony. If we want more happiness from food, we must eat more delicious food. This is impossible. We cannot afford more delicious food due to limited finances. We can’t eat anymore because our stomach restricts us. But many people sincerely believe that this particular direction will bring more happiness. The taste for food fades. If our main idea happiness is food, at the end of life we will be disappointed.
Many people believe that the most important happiness is sex. Of the material joys, sex is truly the most powerful. But our body ages, and we get less joy from it. It seems to a man that his wife is not happy with him, he starts taking medicine and going out on parties. This leads to the fact that a man cheats on his wife, pulls out of himself vitality, stimulating the genitals. The seed contains the most vital energy. Giving it away, a person gets sick, feels like life is melting away. We see that the more we become attached to a loved one, jealousy arises, the feeling that the person is not paying enough attention, we bully loved one. This idea that sex is the main thing causes a lot of anxiety in us. That. this idea leads to disappointment for many people. Isn't it crazy that a person would strive for this? The Vedas say that a person will definitely be disappointed. It is impossible to experience anything more. Majority psychological problems arise from a wrong concept of happiness.
Comfort. In theory, only warmth is enough to live comfortably. But we strive for soft sofas and European-quality renovation. But this requires money, a person works like crazy to buy a sofa. But he will sit on it a couple of times and after 2 weeks he will forget that he has a new sofa.
Dream. Also a source of happiness. Many people live to get enough sleep. They wait for Sunday to get some sleep. Sunday comes, he sleeps until 10 o'clock. And then they walk around with a square head. Because if a person sleeps for more than 6 hours, then he is in passion. A person sleeps for more than 9 hours - in ignorance. Ignorance = Insanity. That is, a misunderstanding of happiness.
A misunderstanding of happiness leads to the destruction of sanity. Another type of misunderstanding of happiness is that some people believe that a person will be happy at work. But in what kind of work? In which there will be a lot of money. Happiness means money. A person works until he starts to get sick. He feels disappointed. No matter how much he worked, there was no more money. He experiences suffering that he put all his strength into this, but to no avail.
Wrong understanding of happiness is the cause of madness. Madness is a misunderstanding of happiness. We think that insanity is when a person does not understand anything. But that's how it is. The person does not understand what will happen to him next. People give birth to 10 children. Because they are very attached to small bodies. They can't give these children anything.
This does not mean that you don’t have to have children, don’t eat, don’t sleep, don’t have sex, don’t arrange your apartment. This means that you don’t have to make this the most important goal of your life.
Happiness is an ever-increasing process. A person cannot be satisfied with what he already has now. If you have plans for new acquisitions, then you are dissatisfied. All people strive for happiness using the same method - increasing material opportunities.
This is in accordance with the knowledge of the Vedas. That a person who has made material happiness the main goal of his life will be dissatisfied at the end of his life. He will remain unhappy. Because human life is not meant to increase material happiness. It is intended to increase spiritual happiness.
In Vedic culture, a person was first given spiritual education. A person must immediately understand what to strive for first. In Vedic culture, people also worked and started families. But their goal was to realize God. They strove for God. Therefore, they spent all their free time engaged in self-awareness. They tried to understand their spiritual nature. This is the source of happiness.
Let's talk about what happiness is. This is a state of mind, not a state of body. The dream has come true, here it comes. But happiness doesn't always come. This is the energy of the soul. The energy of happiness is of a spiritual nature.
When a person does some selfless act, then in this case the Supersoul releases this force of happiness from itself, and the person feels it. Only if a person wants happiness for someone, then this force of happiness goes through his body to another person. Otherwise, it just doesn't come out. If a person receives something from the outside, he can also get happiness from sex, food, sleep. But in this case, happiness comes from the Oversoul in doses, in accordance with the merits that a person had in a past life. Let's say we have 2 safes: one has an unlimited amount of money, the other has a limited amount of money. If you are a reasonable person, you will take money from a safe with an infinite amount of money. But life doesn't work out that way. A safe with a small amount of money is our past achievements. When we want some joys from the outside, then we receive as much material happiness as we deserved piety in past lives. A person takes happiness from the outside, but the Supersoul gives the feeling of happiness as much as we deserve. The lock on the second safe is difficult to open - this is spiritual happiness. Repeating “I wish everyone happiness,” you feel happiness only if you do it selflessly, if you give the results of this wish to people. But it seems to us that it is impossible to do something selflessly. But as soon as a person does something selflessly once, he feels happiness, which in its strength is hundreds, thousands and millions of times greater than material happiness. A person who engages in spiritual practice experiences this state throughout his life, and the feeling of happiness increases. We find it impossible to believe. What about suffering? Death? But There is no death for a pure soul; it feels what its next body will be.
The very idea that happiness will be brought by this life, in which there is no idea of serving God, but there is a desire to earn money, means madness. 99% of people on Earth are in this state. It is impossible to get people out of this state.
It seems to us that everything is bad in life, that the government is bad, there is no justice. But even when holy kings ruled, the Vedas describe that there were people who were unhappy. They were not destined for happiness. They believed that it was the kings who were to blame, that society was to blame. Their loved ones abandoned them; they did not want to live with such stingy people. Gradually their safe was emptied with happiness, they could not feel happy. This means a wrong concept of happiness. This is madness.
Five stages of the power of the mind and its ability to detach feelings from unnecessary ideas in your life.
1. The ability to refrain from unnecessary action prompted by feelings. It seems to us that if we want something, we must have it. But the Vedas say that if we spontaneously want something, it will inevitably lead us to suffering. We need to cultivate the right desires - this means wanting what we need to want. For example, I don’t want chocolate cake, but I want fruit cake. Should I force myself? But when it comes to cakes, you need to eat the one you like. But the very process of switching from material to spiritual happiness requires violence against oneself. All modern psychology built on the thesis that under no circumstances should you commit violence against your mind. You have to tell yourself: I am good, smart, handsome, happy. And cultivate it in yourself. In the same way, we take crap, wrap it in a nice label, put a high price on it, and it becomes a competitive product. This style is dictated by the power of passion. But in reality, if you look inside, how good am I? A feeling of inferiority immediately appears. According to Vedic knowledge, a person should commit violence to his mind. He must tell himself: I will be good if I do this. And if I don't do this, I'll be bad.
A person must know exactly where happiness is. We experience temporary happiness, but more often we experience suffering. But if a person decides that he needs permanent happiness, then he should study spiritual happiness. To do this, you need to study the lives of holy people. The communists considered them schizophrenics. It is necessary to study the life of holy people, because by studying a person understands that there is spiritual happiness. When they looked into the eyes of Seraphim of Sarov, people did not feel any other happiness more than just looking into his eyes. People lined up just to look into his eyes. They felt extraordinary bliss. One saint lived 450 years ago in India. People lined up for him to whip them. If it was a saint who lashed a person with a whip, then he gained love for God. Even when the saint lashes with a whip, he already brings happiness.
First one should associate with the saints through books, then one should seek personal association and see if they are really happy. If you see that these people are happy, then perhaps you will think that you need to take a different path. Not the one everyone follows when they become disillusioned with life. This path does not mean quitting your job. Everything remains the same, but thoughts become different. He begins to constantly wish everyone happiness instead of gossiping and swearing. He begins to constantly pray to God instead of thinking about some problems. He begins to experience happiness despite the fact that he continues to live the same way he lived before. This is not easy to do. Because the mind does not allow us to think in this direction. He tells us: think about money, about problems, gossip. Because this is the taste of our happiness. To give it up, you need to study the lives of other people. Don't think that this will happen on its own. Reason requires practical confirmation. Therefore, repeated visits to holy places and temples gradually refract the perception of the world. After a person begins to feel the spiritual taste, he will be able to refuse some kind of pleasure. Otherwise, it is impossible to give up drinking, smoking, and debauchery. Because this is a source of happiness. But some people are able to stop engaging in material pleasures - going to see their mistress, for example. Such a person experiences terrible pain, but he lives out of a sense of duty.
The same goes for quitting smoking. The person becomes like a madman. Drug addicts even hang themselves; on the one hand, they no longer want to be drug addicts, and on the other hand, they do not have the strength to live without it. However, if a person has felt the highest taste at least once, he without any difficulty gives up betrayal, drugs, smoking, and meat. Because higher taste binds the mind. And the mind is already moving in this direction - hobbies are changing.
Remember your childhood. Let's say you were saving stamps. And then we decided to accumulate badges. If someone had taken a valuable stamp from you earlier, it would have been simply a disaster. But when a person accumulates badges, he will give away his valuable stamp. But he will no longer give away the badges. But then the icons will become uninteresting to him - he will find something more interesting. That. higher taste makes it possible to refuse unnecessary things. This is the only way to get rid of bad habits.
The first stage in the development of the mind, bringing it closer to the highest happiness. One must feel the taste for spiritual happiness. This is only possible:
visiting holy places
communicating with holy people
performing some kind of selfless action in relation to the people around him.
This is the only way to feel the spiritual taste. There is no other way. The first stage is when a person refrains from unnecessary action. He does not smoke; his spiritual taste gives him the opportunity not to do so. This means his mind has become stronger. A stronger mind means more opportunities to be happy. He is no longer carried in the direction in which he was carried. This means there is less madness.
Second phase. We refrain from unnecessary actions, but the desire still remains within us. If a person further enhances his spiritual taste, then he can then refrain from unnecessary desires. Such a person knows (others do not know this) that if he now restrains himself from unnecessary desires and devotes himself to prayer, then in 5 minutes he will become much happier from this than from what he wanted to do. This is an amazing phenomenon. Imagine that you really want to sleep. However, you know that if you sit down now and wish everyone happiness, then you will have more happiness if you fall asleep. Or you want to eat very much, drooling. But if you sit down, start praying and wishing everyone happiness, then this will pass, the appetite will pass and the feeling of happiness will remain.
The third level is self-control, subordination of the mind to a higher goal, returning to the control of the mind. This means control of thoughts. A thought arises and begins to develop into some kind of idea. A person who can stop the thought: “don’t think about it!” - This is the third level of control. This is possible if you have a higher purpose in life. Otherwise, there is no point in mocking your thoughts.
The fourth stage is complete control of the mind and feelings. This stage is called complete peace. A person who feels completely at peace actually feels happiness. Nowadays, people consider the absence of suffering to be happiness. When your belly is full, you are happy. But in reality it is the absence of suffering. Because when the stomach is empty, a person experiences suffering. He fills him with food, and it seems to him that now he is happy, but in fact he is not suffering. In the same way, when a person satisfies the sexual feeling, it no longer bothers him. When a person goes to bed, there is no suffering. And peace is when you no longer want anything. Everything is fine either way. When necessary, a person eats, when necessary, he goes to bed, but he is not attached to this, he is peaceful, and always experiences great happiness. Over the soul gives them constant happiness. Because such a person is constantly disinterested towards people and towards God. If we wanted something for ourselves, we immediately became unhappy. Because we don’t have that. We got it - we want something again. Happiness is also elusive for those who are engaged in spiritual practice. Because as soon as a person begins to think that he is happy, happiness goes away. He should think about the happiness of others. Happiness belongs to no one except God. Therefore, we can be happy, but in this case we must stop caring about our own good.
The fifth level of mind control is absolute holiness, absence of sins, freedom from material desires. A person does not need to control anything. He thinks only about spiritual things. He deals with material affairs out of a sense of duty, he is not interested in all this. This highest level holiness.
Now we will talk about madness in more detail.
The stages of descent into madness as described by the Bhagavad Gita.
1. First stage. By contemplating sense objects, attachment to them arises. Let's say you look at your baby, he is an object of happiness. The more you look at it, the more attached you become to it. Attachment means: I want to get happiness from this object. I start stroking him, kissing him, and then happiness comes. The child becomes the main one in the house. In relation to the objects of our natural affection, we need to behave somewhat differently according to Vedic knowledge. The natural objects of our affection are those to which we have not yet fulfilled our duty.
The young man sees the most beautiful girl and believes that it will bring the most happiness. The Vedas say that this is the girl to whom he is the biggest debtor from his past life. He must give her something. He will work for her all his life, give to her. It seemed like he wanted to be happy. But there is nothing wrong with attachment if you understand what it is. If a person has affection for someone close to him, he should, without wanting anything in return, simply fulfill his duty. If it’s a husband, then he just needs to wash, clean, iron, cook, smile. It's a duty. Will there be any happiness from this? The Vedas say that it will happen, but not always. Sometimes it happens that you do something, but happiness does not come out of it. This means a very large debt. What to do? The Vedas say that if a person works selflessly towards someone, fulfilling his duty, then in this case he will experience happiness as much as he has done good. Even no matter how much debt he repaid. Where will happiness come from? From friends, from acquaintances, from environment. If he works well, he becomes a selfless person, everyone sticks to him. If you put honey in the middle of a clearing in the May summer, do you really think that there won’t be bees there? Likewise, a person who works unselfishly becomes sweet as honey. I want to be friends with him, build relationships. This means spiritual happiness.
But this does not mean that you should not fulfill your responsibilities. You need to try your best to fulfill your responsibilities. A mother should not think that it is her responsibility to enjoy her child's body. She should enjoy the child's actions. Therefore, she must restrain her feelings from caressing him. She should try to give him the opportunity to become a real and selfless person. She should rejoice in his knowledge, his comprehension, his ability to reason, his ability to do right. She should confront him if he does wrong. if the mother is attached to the child's body, it is called madness, she cannot do anything with it. When a child grows up, whom the mother caressed a lot, the mother begins to beat her. According to Vedic knowledge, whenever a mother is attached to the body of a child and is ready to do anything for the sake of the child, that person becomes an absolute egoist.
In the same way, when a person becomes attached to pleasure with his wife, his husband, he thinks: he should plant me, he is so beautiful with me, she is so beautiful, I want to enjoy her. Not wanting to fulfill my responsibilities. Duty means giving happiness. That is, to direct you on the right path of life. The greatest happiness, as we know, comes from the spiritual. For a wife, the main goal is to make her husband begin to engage in self-awareness, to learn how to live correctly. And the main thing for a husband is to help his wife do this. It seems that if I have sex with my husband, then I live for him. I give him the opportunity to be happy. But this happiness becomes more and more attached to the body, this becomes a source of more and more suffering. Attachment to the body means that the wife's body is the absolute source of happiness. And the wife begins to manage this: do you want me to smile? Go and do this. In the Vedas, this body attachment syndrome is called the donkey-donkey relationship. When a donkey approaches a donkey to make love (these are not our examples, the examples of the Vedas), the donkey kicks her legs with all her might. When he kicks hard enough, he lets him come to him.
How then can you be happy in your family if you don’t love your loved one? Understand that love does not mean the desire to take advantage. Love is an absolutely unselfish feeling. Love is to make someone happy, but not to make yourself happy. But we don't understand this by love. We believe that we should be happy. As a result of this understanding of love, we become more and more attached to the objects of our pleasure, we become dependent on them. This results in jealousy, threat, rudeness, cruelty, grumpiness, and touchiness. In women, touchiness means a strong attachment to her husband. For men, cruelty means strong attachment to his wife. There is such a syndrome of a very young wife. The wife is young, beautiful, looks beautiful. The husband begins to be jealous, grumble, scream - strong attachment to his wife. Which one loves whom? Does he love her? No, he wants to enjoy her. She loves him - no, she doesn’t want to enjoy him and doesn’t love him. Love is a mutual feeling. It is impossible not to love someone who truly loves you. According to the Vedas, if you meet a person who loves you at least once in your life, you cannot help but love him. It doesn’t matter what gender he is, older or younger, love will manifest itself towards him as a natural feeling. Sexual feeling is not love at the first stage. This feeling is the desire to use someone else's body. We feel it as love. But in reality it's a completely different feeling. Can love arise in a family? It may arise over time. At first it is a strong sexual feeling. Caring for each other is something to be enjoyed. A wife takes care of her husband because it pleases her, a husband takes care of his wife because he likes it. Gradually, the idea of selfish use of the body in the family will end. And great suffering will begin. Because the husband gets used to his wife’s body, just as the wife gets used to her husband. Everyone knows this. Suffering begins because love is over. Therefore, while there is a period of mutual attraction, we must begin to cultivate true love and selflessly do something for another person. Real love will appear. True love is a very strong feeling of respect, care, etc. which differs from selfish desire: “I will take care of him, but what does he do to me every time?” - This is completely different.
So, the first stage in the development of madness is attachment to objects of pleasure.
The second stage of madness is a strong desire to enjoy this object.
Third stage. If a person cannot enjoy what he wants to enjoy, it turns into anger.
Anger is first caused by greed for the object.
If a person does not satisfy his feeling, then the person falls into illusion.
A person stops remembering all the good things that the person with whom he was angry did for him.
The strength and purity of the mind decreases - a person begins to gossip about this person. A person gets the most effort in his life from discussing other people, even if these are bad actions. If a person discusses the actions of other people with hatred, envy, malice, this means that the person will bring a lot of problems into his life. Because of the wrong attitude. This attitude comes on its own.
The next stage is when rationality decreases, and the person wants to get angry and say something bad about this person.
The last stage is when a person has not coped with this situation, he gets sick, he loses his understanding of happiness. For example, a woman has been attached to her family all her life. But she got angry and at some point came to the understanding: “That’s it! I don't want to live with this person anymore. I want to live with someone else. I'm sick of". As a result, everything she had accumulated, both material and spiritual, was lost. Did she think that she would have nothing? No. This madness had such an impact. Joint accumulated actions, children, give a feeling of happiness. But a person in a state of madness loses all this. Then he either slides further into madness or repents, but it is often too late.
That. strong attachment gives rise to madness. If a woman is attached to serving her husband, and not to her husband, she will never come to such a state. If her husband does not give her the opportunity to serve, she will do something else. She is not attached to pleasure. Happiness will come by itself if you strive to serve. There will be no madness. If he does not give me happiness, then I am not serving enough, I need to serve more.
Let us repeat the stages of development of madness during a person’s life. If a person does not change the concept of material happiness to spiritual happiness, then he gradually goes through the stages of madness. The first stage is exhausting work. He begins to work very hard. He wants more money. This stage affects people aged 25-28 years. Because the sexual feeling gradually subsides, he wants to enjoy something else. This lasts until about 35-40 years.
By the age of 40, one begins to feel tired. A person feels that he can no longer work the way he used to. And he understands that he has done nothing in his life. Then the person thinks: “Why am I going to work?” But he wants to continue to enjoy material wealth. And at this age people begin to engage in some kind of illegal business. They say: “I used to be a fool.” It is necessary to commit fraud, such a person believes.
If a person cannot ensure that he has money, then the stage of disappointment begins - by the age of 45-50. The person feels that he cannot work as before, his loved ones cannot provide for him. He feels disappointed: why did I spend so much effort on them? Why did I work? Nobody appreciates me. Does disappointment come from the fact that a person has worked for the benefit of others? Such a person will live for these people, people will be around him, help him. Even if people left him, he will still be happy.
Fear. A person experiences fear from 55 to 65 years of age. The person thinks - what next? Nothing! There will be more aging, disease, there will be no food, housing will be rotten. There is only suffering ahead. A person still hopes for material happiness, but it simply does not exist.
It does not necessarily arise as senile insanity. It can arise at any moment and is expressed in a complete abandonment of one’s responsibilities: family breakup, job abandonment, drugs, drunkenness. This means that a person went through the previous 4 stages in a past life. But the time comes, and this stage falls on a person. Sometimes it unfolds over several years, sometimes it comes in one day. A person gives up everything in one second, a person wants to give up everything and not see anyone.
What should I do? We need to know that our loved ones can find themselves in this situation at any moment. We must fulfill our duty to them, take care of them. And if at one moment they cruelly abandon us, then there will only be annoyance, but there will be no murderous suffering “I have lost the object of pleasure.” Because you can wish for happiness from a distance. People don’t understand that you can wish happiness even to the person who left you. But it's possible.
Let us analyze the classification of how reason is covered by madness.
A person is deprived of understanding (this stage was a long time ago, not in this life) of his spiritual nature. He believes that he is the body, not the soul. A person looks at himself in the mirror and thinks: I’m getting old. But a person does not age, the soul is eternal.
As soon as a person loses the understanding that he has a spiritual nature, and spiritual nature means a selfless desire to serve, he becomes irresponsible towards people. He doesn't want to do anything for them. Irresponsibility has become so strongly developed in the minds of the inhabitants of the earth that it is very difficult for us to accept the idea of doing something selflessly. Try going out into the street and lovingly giving money to some beggar. He will take the money and won't even pay any attention to you. And you will feel indignant. That you weren't thanked. Selfless means not expecting anything in return. A very difficult situation to achieve in our lives is how crazy we are. Therefore, you need to wish everyone happiness every day. If a person thinks every day about what he will get for wishing everyone happiness, then he will never get what he thinks about. Because the wish for happiness is selfless. The result will come on its own, no need to wait for it.
Strong desires to live an ignorant life appear: a tendency to be unclean, a tendency to bad habits, a penchant for swearing, vulgar jokes, a penchant for sexual perversion, a penchant for pretentious clothing, a penchant for sloppy, dismissive, evil behavior. This stage of increasing ignorant influence on our consciousness. We are attracted to films with violence and cruelty.
A person ceases to understand that he will die. Knowing that you will die, a person immediately stops doing unimportant things. The most important thing is to engage in self-awareness, repent of what you have done wrong, stop thinking about relaxation and laziness, concentrate on the main thing - this means a sense of presence near death. Is she far away? We don't know when we will die. Who is sure that tomorrow he will not die? 99% believe that we will not die tomorrow. We are planning something for tomorrow. Death comes at any moment, but we plan for tomorrow, we believe that at least today everything will be fine. Therefore we live in a relaxed state. We put off all the most important things in our lives - to forgive all people, ask them for forgiveness, start thinking about God, and wish everyone happiness. We put off the most important thing for tomorrow - this means madness.
A turning point in consciousness to such an extent that only money, wealth and fame can bring happiness. There is no other way. Our life on earth begins with the 5th stage. At stage 5 we already got this madness before we even got to this planet. If we were in the previous stages, then we lived in better conditions. The fact that we ended up here means that we really wanted to live for money. This place means that everyone here is after money.
It means that the conditions in which we are now are what we are repeating all these stages. That is, we have already gone through the previous stages in past lives.
Reduced free time – increased time for work
Fatigue. A person cannot think about self-awareness, because he has a lot of work, many responsibilities - there is no opportunity to think about self-awareness, about the most important thing.
Complete indifference to one's own future fate. Such people reason: what difference does it make who I am born in the next life? I don’t know myself and I don’t recognize myself. If you tell them that you will be the same person, only in a different body, they will not believe it. This is the last degree of madness.
When a person falls into intense lust for opposite sex, this is not bad, because a good family can arise as a result. However, the process itself is dangerous, and a person should be afraid of it with all his might. But people sleep and see when this love will come to them. But the Vedas say that this love will be the most unhappy moment in your life.
Classifications of defeat by lust of the heart.
As soon as this power of indomitable love enters your heart at an unnecessary moment in time, when you are already married, it immediately means deprivation of piety. As soon as power enters the heart, a person is already deprived of piety, because this power is indomitable. She makes a man think about another woman; he no longer needs his family. This already deprives a person of piety. Such a person will not be taken seriously.
Mental paralysis. Means that a person completely loses self-control. He wants to achieve his goal at any cost, he is ready to give his life for this. And we know many examples and songs: “let us rejoice in our lifetime at the beauty and the cup, the lucky blade.” That is, women, alcohol and weapons. Desire to rejoice means mental paralysis. A person cannot turn away from the opposite sex, he is attracted. He can't turn his back on bullying someone, he becomes some kind of sadist. The desire for violence is also fascinating.
Dullness of consciousness. A person loses perception of the world around him. First he is attracted to the object, and then gradually consciousness begins to flow away from his head. They tell him: look, your shirt is wrinkled, you quit your job. But he doesn’t understand, it seems to him that they are speaking to him in a different language. He has absolutely no interest in his shirt or his work. He is completely chained to the object of pleasure.
Mental exhaustion. A person loses weight and wastes away. Often such love occurs among young girls.
How to be in a deep pit of depression and in just a few weeks fly up on the wings of happiness, just by making small but... important changes into your regular habits.
Happiness is not something ready-made that can be easily found. It is a consequence of our own actions.
~ Dalai Lama
Over the last ten years, my wife and I have read about a thousand books about happiness, consulted about ten thousand people trying to find it, and talked with a hundred thousand of our subscribers who, every single day, continue to ask us questions about the same thing - about happiness.
All this gave us a pretty clear idea of... no, not what happiness is, but what makes people happy. We have repeatedly seen people in the deepest pit of depression soar upward on the wings of happiness in just a few weeks, just by making small but important changes in their regular habits.
So it's no surprise that once these people understand what makes them happy, those "happy habits" become second nature. That's why they don't talk about them. Those passing by see how happy and satisfied they are with life, but none of them can understand what the reason for their happiness is.
This is exactly what we will talk about in this article - about the habits that happy people have and which they never talk about:
- They don't get involved in other people's negativity.. - Never and under no circumstances throw causeless tantrums or dramatic scenes and do not be close to those who do this. The happiest people I know don't pay the slightest attention to what people say about them. random people, especially if they do it rudely. Moreover, they are often grateful to fate for all the rude, annoying and difficult-character people they meet along the path of life, because they are a living and vivid reminder of who they should never become. They look at them and direct their life path in a completely different direction. You should do the same.
- They share with others what they can, whenever they can.- Although, when you simply give something away, it is rightfully considered a selfless action, sometimes it can bring the giver much more than the recipient. In many cases, providing social support first of all makes us happier, and only then the object of our care. Happy people know this very well, and therefore they are always looking for ways to help those around them, while unhappy people ask themselves the question “What will I get out of this?”
- They care about their important relationships.- Finding Flow, an interesting book on the psychology of happiness, cites surveys and studies that show that those who have five or more friends with whom they can discuss their problems are almost 60% happier than everyone else . And it’s not even about the number of friends - what matters is the effort and attention that you put into relationships with them. The same research shows that even the best relationships can weaken over time, so try to maintain close contact with the people you care about - because personal relationships should never be taken for granted. You need to constantly work on them.
- They love not only others, but also themselves.- The worst thing that can happen to you is to lose yourself because you love someone else too much, to forget that you also deserve love and happiness. Yes, love others, it’s right, it’s useful, don’t forget about yourself. Happy people know that loving yourself is not selfish. They put their own interests first, because this is the only way to find enough strength in yourself to love everyone you care about. Take care of yourself. After all, if you sacrifice all your needs and wants to help someone else, soon you will only be a shadow of the person you once were.
- For them, efficiency is more important than popularity.- Never confuse popularity with effectiveness. Popularity is when everyone loves you. A little and not for long. And effectiveness is when you are capable of something. And it is the second that ultimately means something. But popularity - it passes.
- They know how to say “no” when necessary.- Agreeing to everything that is offered to you is a sure way to being unhappy all your life. If you are constantly busy and don’t even have a free minute to take a break, think about whether it’s because you say “yes” too often? We all have our obligations, but you can’t mindlessly agree to everything - otherwise you will never achieve a calm life. You can’t nod your head at everything - sooner or later someone will take advantage of it. You have to draw the line somewhere, and where is up to you.
- If they are grateful to someone, it is sincerely and from the bottom of their hearts.- Perhaps gratitude is one of the rulers of the kingdom of happiness. What do researchers say about this? In The Happiness Guide, Dr. Sonya Lyubomirskaya writes about this: “The more a person is inclined to gratitude, the less likely he is to be depressed, causeless anxiety, loneliness, envy or neurosis.” Note: Remember how lucky you are. Remember this every single day. The more you remember about those pieces of happiness that you have, the more of them you will have, and the more fully they will form into, in fact, happiness.
- They are incorrigible optimists.- The happiest people are not those who live in certain circumstances, but those who relate to their circumstances in a certain way. They themselves are the creators of their own optimism. Whatever the situation, successful person There will certainly be someone who can always look at his situation with optimism. For him, any mistake is just a chance for growth and a valuable life lesson. Optimistic people see the world as a place chock full of endless possibilities, especially during challenging times.
- They don't take success or mistakes too seriously.- Happy people also end up being successful due to one simple circumstance - they perceive both success and mistakes differently. They don't take their mistakes too seriously and don't let success go to their head. So follow in their footsteps. Be humble, persistent and persistent. Don't let mistakes hurt you or success go to your head.
- They always have a plan in case times get tough. - Happy life- life is not necessarily easy either. And sometimes there come times when it is very, very difficult to be happy. But who, having overcome problems, lives longer and happier after them? We have seen enough difficulties and problems to give an answer to this: those for whom adversity ultimately benefited. Your character is shaped by how you behave during adversity. Try to look at everything objectively. Learn your lesson and move forward. And don't let troubles sadden you for too long.
- They see failures and breaks as defense mechanism from something that shouldn't have happened.- Just because you were rejected does not mean that there is something wrong with you. Rather, it means that the other side simply could not notice what you have to offer it. This means that you have time to make yourself even better - to move forward towards your dream, to become a master of your craft, to find a job that you really like. Happy people know this, and therefore do not consider refusal an insult. That guy didn't call you back this morning? Didn't get hired for an attractive position? The bank decided not to provide you with a loan? Well then it wasn't the best option. And something much better awaits you in the future.
- They live in the present.- Never let your past define your present. Let it better be a lesson that will help you enter the future. No remorse, no memories of the past with anger in my soul. Just live and move forward. We are not destined to know what awaits us ahead, but this only makes the path even more interesting. Yes, yes, this is what makes life worth living. Happy people know this and try to make the most of the present.
- They spend their time well.- When the Guardian reporter who wrote the article “The 5 Most Common Regrets of the Dying” interviewed a hospice nurse, she said that their biggest regret was giving up what they dreamed of. When people realize that their life is almost over, they look back and realize how much they could have done... and that their dream was often just around the corner. And that if only they had done something differently, it would have come true. Few people value the freedom it gives us good health- until we lose it. No wonder they say that there are seven days in a week, and not one of them is called “one day.”
- They give themselves entirely to what matters most to them.- If you are interested in any activity, you will do it when you have free time. If you are truly passionate about something, then in order to find time for this “something”, you will do anything. That's all. And it is the last activity that, as a rule, entails a result that you can be proud of.
- In order to achieve mastery in something, they are ready to endure any adversity.- The fact that it’s not easy for you on the way somewhere, first of all, means that you are going there after all. Happy people know this. They find the strength to learn something new and bring their skills to perfection, even if it is not so easy. Why? Because when they look back and see how much they have progressed along their chosen path, they experience true happiness and satisfaction. Well, besides, in order to become a master at something, you cannot do without first being incompetent in this matter. And what you get when you become a master will easily overcome the adversity on the path to mastery.
- They care about their health.- There is no way to get away from this fact: no matter how much you like physical exercise, if you do them regularly, you will certainly feel better. If your body leaves much to be desired, it will affect your mind, reducing your focus and strength of spirit - and without it, achieving your final goal becomes much more difficult. Recent studies have shown that regular exercise helps people get out of depression much better than doses of antidepressants. After six months of constant exercise, these people became much less prone to depression and neurosis, as their sense of dignity and sense of being capable of something soared to unattainable heights.
- They spend time on new experiences and impressions, rather than on unnecessary things.- Happy people are often very reluctant to spend money on material things, preferring to spend extra money on new experiences or impressions. By the way, this makes us happier for two reasons: 1. A truly good experience only gets better over the years. 2. To get new experiences, you often have to leave the house and communicate with people - and among them there may be those whom it would be nice to meet.
- They appreciate the tiny joys of life.- Happiness is, first of all, not “what”, but “how” - not a destination, but an attitude towards life. Happiness is the ability to enjoy little while striving for more. True happiness cannot exist in us if we do not stop to enjoy it from time to time. If we don't take the time to appreciate a pleasant moment, we rob it of all its beauty. Sometimes the most simple things in life can be the most enjoyable - if only we remember to enjoy them.
- They understand and accept the fleeting nature of life.- Just because something doesn't last forever doesn't mean it wasn't worth it. Happy people know this to be true - there is a time and place for everything. Relationships, work and life experiences are all just part of the whole. Over time, we grow older and wiser, and we understand what we need to hold on to with all our might and what we need to let go. Sometimes something or someone just can't stay with us. Sometimes the changes we hate are in fact the only thing that can ultimately help us achieve our goal. And sometimes leaving is the only way to take a step forward.
- They live the life they really want.- This last point, in general, draws a line under all the previous ones. One of the complaints Angel and I hear most often from our clients is, “If only I were brave enough to live the life I want, rather than the life others want me to live.” Don't do this to yourself. What other people think - and especially what they want - is absolutely not important to you. Your hopes, dreams, your goals are what matters! Do as your heart tells you. Surround yourself with people who will always support you - not the “you” they want you to be, but the real you. Make real friends and never lose touch with them. Say what you want to those who need to hear it. Express your feelings. Stop and smell the roses. And most importantly, understand that in most cases it is up to you to decide whether to be happy.
Afterword
This list is not a universal recipe for universal happiness. No, in it I just want to shed light on a few good habits that can change your life for the better. After all, your happiness largely depends on your actions. Scientific research, cited in the books mentioned in this article, prove that we can, if not become happy, then get pretty close to happiness, simply by slightly changing our everyday habits. And our habits will change everything else for us.
As Elbert Hubbar once said: “Happiness is a habit, so cherish it.”
And now it’s your turn...
What about you? What habits or mindsets help you be happy? Leave a comment and share your thoughts.
